Child Abuse Survivor

I can’t necessarily vouch for every blog on the list, but the Depression Treatment Center has put together a list of the Best Depression Blogs over on their site. In their words:

Finding the best blogs on depression and depressive disorders can take a lot of time and can be depressing all on its own. We have compiled a list of the best blogs on depression that you can keep an eye on without having to do your own searching. Each one has been selected based on quality of information as well as how frequently it is updated. We know that you will find these quality blogs to be just as informative as we do and well worth reading.

Whether you are searching for help yourself, to help a loved one or just for more knowledge, we’ve got you covered. We have handpicked the top ten best blogs about depression on the Internet. These authors are depression survivors, physicians and therapists who want to help. The newest studies, firsthand accounts and helpful tips are just some of the great morsels you’ll find in our top ten.

I am only familiar with a couple of the blogs on the list, but if you’re on the lookout for more information about depression, and want to follow some blogs that you can continue to learn from, you could do a lot worse than starting with these 10.

What are your favorite blogs on depression?

If you’re interested in a little interview I did recently with the founder of the No Longer Silent Movement, you can check it out over on their blog.

As I mentioned before, I think it’s a great thing that Nicolette is trying to reach survivors at a young age. So many of us went through such pain and misery in our adult years because we didn’t get help, or tried to keep our issues secret. How I wish survivors would not do that to themselves! Hopefully, giving them a role model (Not that I consider myself a role model, but I am someone who survived, and has overcome an abusive past) will let them know that they are not alone, and are on a path that others have taken before them.

Lori’s Song is a brand new site, that just went live today. It is also a charity designed to provide a supportive area for abuse survivors.

From their mission statement:

We have many goals for Lori’s Song. Most prominent in our vision is a positive focus on healing and thriving. Our comprehensive website provides a plethora of resources, insights, and information. Understanding the effects of abuse and their many manifestations in our adult lives is vital to healing from the past and forging a healthy and fulfilling future. Our website offers information on all aspects of healing from child abuse and is a springboard to other helpful resources.

So check it out and see what they have to offer. I know I will be back to see how things develop. It’s always great to see some long time contributors to the online survivor community working together to provide new resources!

Recently, I was contacted by Nicolette Winn, the founder of the No Longer Silent Movement (http://www.nolomovement.com).

The first paragraph of the NoLo Movement’s mission struck a chord with me.

Giving a voice to those who previously had thought themselves voiceless, the No Longer Silenced Movement seeks to empower teenage and young adult survivors of child abuse. By working to build a national network, we hope to show them that a better way is there for them than continuing the cycle of abuse and the hardships that are fostered through it.

When I was a teenager, and through the early years of my adulthood, I was still very much under the impression that no one else was dealing with what I was dealing with. I spent, wasted really, many years without much support, and definitely without role models to show me that recovery was possible. As much as I try to get the word out that survivors are not alone, I also know I’m just a guy with a website. There is so much more that survivors need that I can’t provide. That’s why it’s great that there are groups being formed, trying to reach out to any specific group of survivors, especially at a young age, where they have the chance to not waste as many years as I did in unhealthy behavior before they start healing.

If you are, or know, a young survivor, you may want to consider getting them in touch with NoLo and help to build that network of young adult survivors!

If you’ve ever wondered about the Blog Carnival Against Child Abuse, and wanted more information about what it is, and how you can participate, head over to From Tracie and take a look at the page she has describing what it is. It should provided answers to your questions, as well as links to the entire carnival archives!

Thanks to Kate1975 for pointing me to it!

So nice to see such a large number of submissions, and even more, some new folks submitting for the first time! Thanks to everyone for getting the word out, and for sharing their posts with us. It truly shows me that there are many, many survivors finding their voices during this month of child abuse awareness.

With that said, let’s get right into the categories!

Advocacy and Awareness:

Tricia McKnight shared a post with this introduction. “We all are human and we all use our eyes, rather than our heart, to Judge those around us. If others could see inside our souls as to what we endured and what we have conquered – how would they feel if they had to carry this horrific and disgusting secret??? Read “Judging Eyes” and see if your heart can be touched to reach the reality of another person before turning away.”

Our own Blog Carnival organizer, Tracie, shared another touching story in Separate Cars

Jayneartin shared a story, which was also part of a “Five Sentence Fiction Challenge”. Thus it’s short, but very effective! Listen to the Children

Sherry, on her Wounded Breeze blog, shares the one thing we can all do, every month, in A Gift of a Smile to a Child Alone.

Lastly, Rox sent us her thoughts on Child Abuse Awareness Month, her first time submitting an article, right at the beginning of April. Definitely quite a lot to think about. Personally, reading it reminded me that speaking out about what happened to me won’t necessarily change the world, nor should I expect it to, but it can reach individual survivors and let them know that they are not alone. That’s good enough to keep doing it, in my book.

Aftermath:

Tracie, having a rather prolific April of writing, shared her story of the effects of abuse – Broken Cookies

Speaking of prolific, Kate submitted two posts on the topic of aftermath, Taking Back the Enemy’s Territory and Being Different

Art Therapy:

Beth wrote the following to introduce her post:

“I’m actually working on a story (novella or e-book I suppose) as part of a Challenge. It’s my first attempt at writing fiction and I made my main character a little girl who is a survivor of domestic violence. This link is to my first post/chapter/segment in the series. It could easily stand alone although I hope people will consider following more of Allie’s story“

Healing and Therapy:

My co-blogger on the News and Reviews site became a first time contributor to the blog carnival, with his own story of starting therapy and what he’s used to help healing.

RebeccaPi wrote “I’m struggling to forgive the person who abused me and my children- not because he deserves it, but because I need to have a healed heart. This post is about my search for what forgiveness means and how I can go about healing my heart.” I think we can all relate to A Change of Heart.

Tracie adds one from the Band Back Together blog, Twitter Parties are Good for the Soul, and I couldn’t agree more. Sometimes when we most want to be alone, what we really need is the chance tor each out and connect with someone else. Social Networking sites are a great way to do that when all else fails! As she wrote herself: “I still struggle with April being child abuse awareness month, because it is such a hard month for me, personally, with flashbacks and memories. But I put myself out there and participated in a discussion on twitter about surviving sexual assault and was reminded that hiding (my go-to coping technique) never really helps me.”

Kate adds some insight into friendships for survivors in Here’s the Thing:  “This post is about learning good boundaries as a survivor when it comes to new friends. My survivor blog friends taught me what a real friend is.”

Jenny shares some very personal thoughts on Stockholm Syndrome for abuse survivors in Associating

For my own submission, I’m also adding a metaphor for healing. Roll With the Changes.

Survivor Stories:

The Middle State shared some very personal thoughts in The One Thing. I found parts of it reminded me of my own thoughts a couple of months back about making kids easy targets for those who would abuse or bully them. It’s the damage caused to kids that makes them vulnerable.

Sperk, a new contributor as well, sent in This is Your Journey. How many times have I offered up that same sentence when talking to survivors. We’re all on our own journeys, there’s no right or wrong way to heal nor a set amount of time, so long as you do it!

Erin Grace shared two blog post with her story, The Day She Went to Work and Footsteps (The Cult of “K”)

Ray shares his own experiences with an abusive childhood as well in a post simply titled Abuse.

Poetry:

And we finish up this impressive gathering of survivors speaking out with our one poetry entry for this month, Brittany’s The Man Who Molded Me

Thank you to everyone who submitted an article, and for those of you who continue to write, read, and comment on blogs to help our little community grow. It’s been an honor reading the entries that were shared this month, and being the host!

I came across this blog post the other day, entitled 12 Things Successful People Do Differently, and it occurred to me that many of the traits set out in the article also serve as good advice for survivors going through recovery.

Think about your own recovery and see how some of these apply:

• They create and pursue S.M.A.R.T. goals

• They work outside of their comfort zone.

• They focus on making small, continuous improvements.

• They maintain a positive outlook as they learn from their mistakes.

• They spend time with the right people.

• They maintain balance in their life.

As I look back on the years I spent in therapy and trying to rebuild my life as an adult, I can not only see where these things were useful, I can see even more how much not doing some of these things set me back. Not maintaining a positive outlook, partially created by surrounding myself with negative people, can do real damage to you as you heal, not to mention trying to do too much, or trying to do things that are impossible.

Take a look at the whole article, and despite the fact that it’s not focused on healing, think about how some of these skills are actually quite transferable. Then, figure out ways you can incorporate some of them into your healing. I think you’ll be glad you did!

I’ve been approached by a fellow survivor who is writing a book. They’ve gotten through Part 1 and really want to be able to share what they have so far with some kindred spirits, folks who are embracing healing from abuse and attempting to turn their adult lives into something positive. Basically, they would like some feedback on what is right now just a rough draft, really rough from what I’ve been told, to know whether what they are writing is on the right track, and would do some good out in the world. Unfortunately, due to a backlog of requests to do reviews, and a general time crunch for me professionally, I had to turn this down, at least for now. If you would be interested in providing some feedback to a survivor/author just starting out, leave a comment and include your email address in the comment form. Don’t worry, no one but me sees the email address that is entered in the form, but I will pass your address along to our aspiring author!

Ken from NursingSchools.net was kind enough to send me an email informing me that this blog was included in their 40 Excellent Blogs for PTSD Support.

I’m touched that they thought this little blog of mine was worthy of being included, and I highly encourage you to go take a look at he whole list. Some of them are folks that I’ve read before, but quite a few are new to me. I’m looking forward to reading them as well!

Thanks Ken!

I guess it’s only appropriate that Pysch Central launch a blog named Managing Depression Skillfully on National Depression Screening Day, eh?

Actually, I think it will be quite an interesting look at dealing with depression, and recognizing all the things in our lives that contribute to, as opposed to helping with, depression. If nothing else, it will certainly give those of us who have, or are currently suffering from depression something to think about.