{"id":11579,"date":"2022-04-11T06:22:44","date_gmt":"2022-04-11T13:22:44","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\/reviews\/?p=11579"},"modified":"2022-04-11T06:20:17","modified_gmt":"2022-04-11T13:20:17","slug":"sharing-ideas-to-self-soothe-when-trauma-makes-you-feel-unloved","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\/reviews\/2022\/04\/11\/sharing-ideas-to-self-soothe-when-trauma-makes-you-feel-unloved\/","title":{"rendered":"Sharing &#8211; Ideas to Self-Soothe When Trauma Makes You Feel Unloved"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class='__iawmlf-post-loop-links' style='display:none;' data-iawmlf-post-links='[{&quot;id&quot;:487,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;https:\\\/\\\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\\\/wordpress\\\/2018\\\/09\\\/26\\\/quick-thought-number-4-the-appreciation-file-in-the-digital-age&quot;,&quot;archived_href&quot;:&quot;http:\\\/\\\/web-wp.archive.org\\\/web\\\/20231211152028\\\/https:\\\/\\\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\\\/wordpress\\\/2018\\\/09\\\/26\\\/quick-thought-number-4-the-appreciation-file-in-the-digital-age\\\/&quot;,&quot;redirect_href&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;checks&quot;:[{&quot;date&quot;:&quot;2025-12-01 09:19:12&quot;,&quot;http_code&quot;:503},{&quot;date&quot;:&quot;2025-12-29 22:23:09&quot;,&quot;http_code&quot;:200},{&quot;date&quot;:&quot;2026-02-07 14:47:21&quot;,&quot;http_code&quot;:200},{&quot;date&quot;:&quot;2026-02-14 16:24:19&quot;,&quot;http_code&quot;:200},{&quot;date&quot;:&quot;2026-03-06 18:42:51&quot;,&quot;http_code&quot;:200},{&quot;date&quot;:&quot;2026-03-12 18:20:06&quot;,&quot;http_code&quot;:200},{&quot;date&quot;:&quot;2026-04-13 16:15:12&quot;,&quot;http_code&quot;:200},{&quot;date&quot;:&quot;2026-04-20 22:55:39&quot;,&quot;http_code&quot;:200}],&quot;broken&quot;:false,&quot;last_checked&quot;:{&quot;date&quot;:&quot;2026-04-20 22:55:39&quot;,&quot;http_code&quot;:200},&quot;process&quot;:&quot;done&quot;},{&quot;id&quot;:488,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;https:\\\/\\\/themighty.com\\\/2022\\\/04\\\/trauma-feel-unloved-self-soothing-ideas&quot;,&quot;archived_href&quot;:&quot;http:\\\/\\\/web-wp.archive.org\\\/web\\\/20220604231021\\\/https:\\\/\\\/themighty.com\\\/2022\\\/04\\\/trauma-feel-unloved-self-soothing-ideas\\\/&quot;,&quot;redirect_href&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;checks&quot;:[{&quot;date&quot;:&quot;2025-12-01 09:19:14&quot;,&quot;http_code&quot;:200},{&quot;date&quot;:&quot;2025-12-29 22:23:11&quot;,&quot;http_code&quot;:200},{&quot;date&quot;:&quot;2026-02-14 16:24:20&quot;,&quot;http_code&quot;:200}],&quot;broken&quot;:false,&quot;last_checked&quot;:{&quot;date&quot;:&quot;2026-02-14 16:24:20&quot;,&quot;http_code&quot;:200},&quot;process&quot;:&quot;done&quot;}]'><\/div>\n<p>I have also <a href=\"https:\/\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\/wordpress\/2018\/09\/26\/quick-thought-number-4-the-appreciation-file-in-the-digital-age\/\">talked about this before<\/a>. So if you are doing something like this, that&#8217;s 3 other people doing it. (Frankly, it should be everyone.)<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>&#8220;When I mentioned to a friend that I save messages and photos to look at to feel better, he said he did the same thing. I felt a little bit of relief knowing I wasn\u2019t the only one who did this, because for a hot second I felt kind of ashamed that I needed these reminders, like maybe there was something pathological about it. This friend immediately sent me a new message with a note reminding me that he cares about me, that I\u2019m awesome, and that I\u2019m loved. That instantly made me feel better.\u00a0&#8220;<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>There are two things I want you to think about here.<\/p>\n<p>1. Save the things that comfort you to look at, listen to, read, etc. Whatever works for you on a hard day to feel a bit better, save those. Encourage other people to do the same.<\/p>\n<p>2. Send more messages that people can save to make them feel less alone on a hard day. I love the fact that the first response a friend had to hearing Monika saved messages like this, and might have lost them, was to send exactly that kind of message.<\/p>\n<p>So hey, send more of those. Remind people in your life that you appreciate them and care about them. In personal and professional relationships, just say thank you in meaningful ways. You never know who saves those messages to get them through the days they don&#8217;t feel good enough.<\/p>\n<p>I do. I bet people around you do too.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/themighty.com\/2022\/04\/trauma-feel-unloved-self-soothing-ideas\/\">https:\/\/themighty.com\/2022\/04\/trauma-feel-unloved-self-soothing-ideas\/<\/a><\/p>\n<div class=\"syndication-links\"><span class=\"syn-text\">Also on:<\/span><ul class=\"relsyn\"><li><a aria-label=\"flipboard\" class=\"u-syndication syn-link\" href=\"https:\/\/flipboard.com\/@mikemac29\/child-abuse-survivors-8o2743fsz\"> <span class=\"syndication-link-icon svg-flipboard\" style=\"display: inline-block; max-width: 1rem; margin: 2px;\" aria-hidden=\"true\" aria-label=\"Flipboard\" title=\"Flipboard\" ><svg role=\"img\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\"><title>Flipboard<\/title><path d=\"M0 0v24h24V0H0zm19.2 9.6h-4.8v4.8H9.6v4.8H4.8V4.8h14.4v4.8z\"\/><\/svg><\/span><\/a><\/li><li><a aria-label=\"facebook\" class=\"u-syndication syn-link\" href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/219569363651\/posts\/635776671705634\"> <span class=\"syndication-link-icon svg-facebook\" style=\"display: inline-block; max-width: 1rem; margin: 2px;\" aria-hidden=\"true\" aria-label=\"Facebook\" title=\"Facebook\" ><svg role=\"img\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\"><title>Facebook<\/title><path d=\"M9.101 23.691v-7.98H6.627v-3.667h2.474v-1.58c0-4.085 1.848-5.978 5.858-5.978.401 0 .955.042 1.468.103a8.68 8.68 0 0 1 1.141.195v3.325a8.623 8.623 0 0 0-.653-.036 26.805 26.805 0 0 0-.733-.009c-.707 0-1.259.096-1.675.309a1.686 1.686 0 0 0-.679.622c-.258.42-.374.995-.374 1.752v1.297h3.919l-.386 2.103-.287 1.564h-3.246v8.245C19.396 23.238 24 18.179 24 12.044c0-6.627-5.373-12-12-12s-12 5.373-12 12c0 5.628 3.874 10.35 9.101 11.647Z\"\/><\/svg><\/span><\/a><\/li><li><a aria-label=\"x\" class=\"u-syndication syn-link\" href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/CA_Survivor\/status\/1645879553523437573\"> <span class=\"syndication-link-icon svg-x\" style=\"display: inline-block; max-width: 1rem; margin: 2px;\" aria-hidden=\"true\" aria-label=\"X\" title=\"X\" ><svg role=\"img\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\"><title>X<\/title><path d=\"M18.901 1.153h3.68l-8.04 9.19L24 22.846h-7.406l-5.8-7.584-6.638 7.584H.474l8.6-9.83L0 1.154h7.594l5.243 6.932ZM17.61 20.644h2.039L6.486 3.24H4.298Z\"\/><\/svg><\/span><\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/div><span class=\"kt-load-after-post\"><\/span>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>There are two things I want you to think about here.<\/p>\n<p>1. Save the things that comfort you to look at, listen to, read, etc. Whatever works for you on a hard day to feel a bit better, save those. Encourage other people to do the same.<\/p>\n<p>2. Send more messages that people can save to make them feel less alone on a hard day. I love that the first response a friend had to hearing Monika saved messages like this, and might have lost them, was to send exactly that kind of message.<\/p>\n<p>So hey, send more of those. Remind people in your life that you appreciate them and care about them. In personal and professional relationships, just say thank you in meaningful ways. You never know who saves those messages to get them through the days they don&#8217;t feel good enough.<\/p>\n<p>I do. I bet people around you do too.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":10863,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"mf2_syndication":[],"_kad_post_transparent":"default","_kad_post_title":"default","_kad_post_layout":"default","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"default","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"default","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"_kad_post_classname":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"webmentions_disabled_pings":false,"webmentions_disabled":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[35],"tags":[72,58],"class_list":["post-11579","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-links","tag-support","tag-trauma"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Sharing - Ideas to Self-Soothe When Trauma Makes You Feel Unloved<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\/reviews\/2022\/04\/11\/sharing-ideas-to-self-soothe-when-trauma-makes-you-feel-unloved\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Sharing - Ideas to Self-Soothe When Trauma Makes You Feel Unloved\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"There are two things I want you to think about here.  1. Save the things that comfort you to look at, listen to, read, etc. Whatever works for you on a hard day to feel a bit better, save those. Encourage other people to do the same.  2. Send more messages that people can save to make them feel less alone on a hard day. I love that the first response a friend had to hearing Monika saved messages like this, and might have lost them, was to send exactly that kind of message.  So hey, send more of those. Remind people in your life that you appreciate them and care about them. In personal and professional relationships, just say thank you in meaningful ways. You never know who saves those messages to get them through the days they don&#039;t feel good enough.  I do. I bet people around you do too.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\/reviews\/2022\/04\/11\/sharing-ideas-to-self-soothe-when-trauma-makes-you-feel-unloved\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Survivors News and Reviews\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/mikemac29\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:author\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/mikemac29\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2022-04-11T13:22:44+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\/reviews\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/happy_birthday_greeting_card_beside_black_pen-scopio-7e1aae42-c071-4e74-bb97-0de6cfde09b5-scaled-e1633730870813.jpg?fit=640%2C427&ssl=1\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"640\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"427\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"MikeM\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@CA_Survivor\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@CA_Survivor\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"MikeM\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"2 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\\\/reviews\\\/2022\\\/04\\\/11\\\/sharing-ideas-to-self-soothe-when-trauma-makes-you-feel-unloved\\\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\\\/reviews\\\/2022\\\/04\\\/11\\\/sharing-ideas-to-self-soothe-when-trauma-makes-you-feel-unloved\\\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"MikeM\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\\\/reviews\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/dbc4a41a301b6455b3717df14ea3533e\"},\"headline\":\"Sharing &#8211; 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Save the things that comfort you to look at, listen to, read, etc. Whatever works for you on a hard day to feel a bit better, save those. Encourage other people to do the same.  2. Send more messages that people can save to make them feel less alone on a hard day. I love that the first response a friend had to hearing Monika saved messages like this, and might have lost them, was to send exactly that kind of message.  So hey, send more of those. Remind people in your life that you appreciate them and care about them. In personal and professional relationships, just say thank you in meaningful ways. You never know who saves those messages to get them through the days they don't feel good enough.  I do. I bet people around you do too.","og_url":"https:\/\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\/reviews\/2022\/04\/11\/sharing-ideas-to-self-soothe-when-trauma-makes-you-feel-unloved\/","og_site_name":"Survivors News and Reviews","article_publisher":"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/mikemac29","article_author":"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/mikemac29","article_published_time":"2022-04-11T13:22:44+00:00","og_image":[{"width":640,"height":427,"url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\/reviews\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/happy_birthday_greeting_card_beside_black_pen-scopio-7e1aae42-c071-4e74-bb97-0de6cfde09b5-scaled-e1633730870813.jpg?fit=640%2C427&ssl=1","type":"image\/jpeg"}],"author":"MikeM","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_creator":"@CA_Survivor","twitter_site":"@CA_Survivor","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"MikeM","Est. reading time":"2 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"Article","@id":"https:\/\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\/reviews\/2022\/04\/11\/sharing-ideas-to-self-soothe-when-trauma-makes-you-feel-unloved\/#article","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\/reviews\/2022\/04\/11\/sharing-ideas-to-self-soothe-when-trauma-makes-you-feel-unloved\/"},"author":{"name":"MikeM","@id":"https:\/\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\/reviews\/#\/schema\/person\/dbc4a41a301b6455b3717df14ea3533e"},"headline":"Sharing &#8211; 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