{"id":15603,"date":"2024-06-08T07:51:06","date_gmt":"2024-06-08T12:51:06","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\/reviews\/?p=15603"},"modified":"2024-06-07T21:23:48","modified_gmt":"2024-06-08T02:23:48","slug":"sharing-stop-listening-to-these-5-pieces-of-advice-that-can-harm-your-mental-health","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\/reviews\/2024\/06\/08\/sharing-stop-listening-to-these-5-pieces-of-advice-that-can-harm-your-mental-health\/","title":{"rendered":"Sharing &#8211; Stop Listening To These 5 Pieces Of Advice That Can Harm Your Mental Health"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class='__iawmlf-post-loop-links' style='display:none;' data-iawmlf-post-links='[{&quot;id&quot;:164,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;https:\\\/\\\/www.huffpost.com\\\/entry\\\/societal-beliefs-therapist-mental-health_l_66560927e4b022987c31bb97&quot;,&quot;archived_href&quot;:&quot;http:\\\/\\\/web-wp.archive.org\\\/web\\\/20240902185527\\\/https:\\\/\\\/www.huffpost.com\\\/entry\\\/societal-beliefs-therapist-mental-health_l_66560927e4b022987c31bb97&quot;,&quot;redirect_href&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;checks&quot;:[{&quot;date&quot;:&quot;2025-12-01 04:20:17&quot;,&quot;http_code&quot;:206}],&quot;broken&quot;:false,&quot;last_checked&quot;:{&quot;date&quot;:&quot;2025-12-01 04:20:17&quot;,&quot;http_code&quot;:206},&quot;process&quot;:&quot;done&quot;}]'><\/div>\n<p>Abuse survivors have heard a few of these. They make me cringe when I hear them, especially this one:<\/p>\n<blockquote><p><strong>\u2018Family is everything.\u2019<\/strong><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>How many survivors have been told to stop talking about their abuse, to forgive their abuser, to coexist with their abuser, all in the name of family unity? I know too many who have found themselves sacrificed on the altar of this myth. They&#8217;ve been silenced, ignored, and suffered further trauma in the name of keeping the family peace so that their abuser can exist comfortably in the family.<\/p>\n<p>Many have decided to cut off contact with their families. I can&#8217;t imagine how difficult that decision would be. I can&#8217;t imagine how much further harm we do to them when we insist that nothing is as important as family.<\/p>\n<p>We could also talk about the damage done to children and adults when we believe one of the other pieces of advice in the article below: that divorce is always wrong. How many children grew up in violent, abusive households because one of their parents couldn&#8217;t get out or were encouraged to stay in that abusive relationship by people who didn&#8217;t think divorce was acceptable?<\/p>\n<p>How many of them died? I know a few kids who were orphaned as a result of domestic abuse. I&#8217;ve heard stories of kids who witnessed the death of their parents in a murder\/suicide act of violence. Do we think that trauma is better than letting people get divorced? Yeah, we need to stop insisting that this is true.<\/p>\n<p>What other pieces of advice should survivors feel free to ignore?<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.huffpost.com\/entry\/societal-beliefs-therapist-mental-health_l_66560927e4b022987c31bb97\">https:\/\/www.huffpost.com\/entry\/societal-beliefs-therapist-mental-health_l_66560927e4b022987c31bb97<\/a><\/p>\n<div class=\"syndication-links\"><span class=\"syn-text\">Also on:<\/span><ul class=\"relsyn\"><li><a aria-label=\"tumblr\" class=\"u-syndication syn-link\" href=\"https:\/\/www.tumblr.com\/blog\/view\/t:c4gTZash4jhfc6YyjwLx0A\/752721720364924928\"> <span class=\"syndication-link-icon svg-tumblr\" style=\"display: inline-block; max-width: 1rem; margin: 2px;\" aria-hidden=\"true\" aria-label=\"Tumblr\" title=\"Tumblr\" ><svg role=\"img\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\"><title>Tumblr<\/title><path d=\"M14.563 24c-5.093 0-7.031-3.756-7.031-6.411V9.747H5.116V6.648c3.63-1.313 4.512-4.596 4.71-6.469C9.84.051 9.941 0 9.999 0h3.517v6.114h4.801v3.633h-4.82v7.47c.016 1.001.375 2.371 2.207 2.371h.09c.631-.02 1.486-.205 1.936-.419l1.156 3.425c-.436.636-2.4 1.374-4.156 1.404h-.178l.011.002z\"\/><\/svg><\/span><\/a><\/li><li><a aria-label=\"flipboard\" class=\"u-syndication syn-link\" href=\"https:\/\/flipboard.com\/@mikemac29\/child-abuse-survivors-8o2743fsz\"> <span class=\"syndication-link-icon svg-flipboard\" style=\"display: inline-block; max-width: 1rem; margin: 2px;\" aria-hidden=\"true\" aria-label=\"Flipboard\" title=\"Flipboard\" ><svg role=\"img\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\"><title>Flipboard<\/title><path d=\"M0 0v24h24V0H0zm19.2 9.6h-4.8v4.8H9.6v4.8H4.8V4.8h14.4v4.8z\"\/><\/svg><\/span><\/a><\/li><li><a aria-label=\"x\" class=\"u-syndication syn-link\" href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/CA_Survivor\/status\/1842629561277989223\"> <span class=\"syndication-link-icon svg-x\" style=\"display: inline-block; max-width: 1rem; margin: 2px;\" aria-hidden=\"true\" aria-label=\"X\" title=\"X\" ><svg role=\"img\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\"><title>X<\/title><path d=\"M18.901 1.153h3.68l-8.04 9.19L24 22.846h-7.406l-5.8-7.584-6.638 7.584H.474l8.6-9.83L0 1.154h7.594l5.243 6.932ZM17.61 20.644h2.039L6.486 3.24H4.298Z\"\/><\/svg><\/span><\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/div><span class=\"kt-load-after-post\"><\/span>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>How many survivors have been told to stop talking about their abuse, to forgive their abuser, to coexist with their abuser, all in the name of family unity? I know too many who have found themselves sacrificed on the altar of this myth. They&#8217;ve been silenced, ignored, and suffered further trauma in the name of keeping the family peace so that their abuser can exist comfortably in the family.\u00a0<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":15682,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"mf2_syndication":[],"_kad_post_transparent":"default","_kad_post_title":"default","_kad_post_layout":"default","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"default","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"default","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"_kad_post_classname":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"webmentions_disabled_pings":false,"webmentions_disabled":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[35],"tags":[37,107,133,38,58],"class_list":["post-15603","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-links","tag-abuse","tag-family","tag-parents","tag-survivors","tag-trauma"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Sharing - Stop Listening To These 5 Pieces Of Advice That Can Harm Your Mental Health<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\/reviews\/2024\/06\/08\/sharing-stop-listening-to-these-5-pieces-of-advice-that-can-harm-your-mental-health\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Sharing - Stop Listening To These 5 Pieces Of Advice That Can Harm Your Mental Health\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"How many survivors have been told to stop talking about their abuse, to forgive their abuser, to coexist with their abuser, all in the name of family unity? I know too many who have found themselves sacrificed on the altar of this myth. 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I know too many who have found themselves sacrificed on the altar of this myth. 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