{"id":16333,"date":"2024-10-31T20:05:41","date_gmt":"2024-11-01T01:05:41","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\/reviews\/?p=16333"},"modified":"2024-10-31T20:02:58","modified_gmt":"2024-11-01T01:02:58","slug":"sharing-what-not-to-say-to-someone-with-mental-health-issues","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\/reviews\/2024\/10\/31\/sharing-what-not-to-say-to-someone-with-mental-health-issues\/","title":{"rendered":"Sharing &#8211; What not to say to someone with mental health issues"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class='__iawmlf-post-loop-links' style='display:none;' data-iawmlf-post-links='[{&quot;id&quot;:129,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;https:\\\/\\\/normalizebeingdifferent.com\\\/2024\\\/10\\\/30\\\/what-not-to-say-to-someone-with-mental-health-issues&quot;,&quot;archived_href&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;redirect_href&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;checks&quot;:[],&quot;broken&quot;:false,&quot;last_checked&quot;:null,&quot;process&quot;:&quot;done&quot;}]'><\/div>\n<p>We discuss it constantly, but I wanted to share another voice on the same topic.<\/p>\n<p>In this case, you should not only stop worrying about fixing things or saying the &#8220;right&#8221; thing that will fix them but also just shut up. Your questions and comments are actively making them worse.<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>But when it comes to saying and asking things, let me tell you this: You do not need to fix us, you do not need to save us, you do not even need to understand us. The only thing you can do for someone close to you going through hard stuff, is to sit with them. Through the anger, the pain, the despair, but also through the pride, the improvements, the moments of joy. You cannot take anything away from us, it is not even possible to share those devastating emotions. But you can sit with us, so we do not have to endure them alone.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>In my own experience, at my worst, I was alone. I made people uncomfortable because they didn&#8217;t know what to say or how to fix me. The truth was I didn&#8217;t need them to fix me. I needed them to treat me like they did before. They needed to talk to me about the ball game or the latest music they were listening to and stay connected to me somehow. I couldn&#8217;t speak to them about what I was going through, and I didn&#8217;t have the words to convey the pain I was in, but it would have done so much good to have someone remind me that I was still me, in the midst of all that.<\/p>\n<p>Most people at the time couldn&#8217;t do that. They couldn&#8217;t sit with it and be uncomfortable alongside me. I didn&#8217;t get Sara&#8217;s questions in the article below because there wasn&#8217;t anyone around to ask them. But I can see why she reacts so negatively to them.<\/p>\n<p>Read more below:<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/normalizebeingdifferent.com\/2024\/10\/30\/what-not-to-say-to-someone-with-mental-health-issues\/\">https:\/\/normalizebeingdifferent.com\/2024\/10\/30\/what-not-to-say-to-someone-with-mental-health-issues\/<\/a><\/p>\n<div class=\"syndication-links\"><span class=\"syn-text\">Also on:<\/span><ul class=\"relsyn\"><li><a aria-label=\"flipboard\" class=\"u-syndication syn-link\" href=\"https:\/\/flipboard.com\/@mikemac29\/child-abuse-survivors-8o2743fsz\"> <span class=\"syndication-link-icon svg-flipboard\" style=\"display: inline-block; max-width: 1rem; margin: 2px;\" aria-hidden=\"true\" aria-label=\"Flipboard\" title=\"Flipboard\" ><svg role=\"img\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\"><title>Flipboard<\/title><path d=\"M0 0v24h24V0H0zm19.2 9.6h-4.8v4.8H9.6v4.8H4.8V4.8h14.4v4.8z\"\/><\/svg><\/span><\/a><\/li><li><a aria-label=\"x\" class=\"u-syndication syn-link\" href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/CA_Survivor\/status\/1852155454706847880\"> <span class=\"syndication-link-icon svg-x\" style=\"display: inline-block; max-width: 1rem; margin: 2px;\" aria-hidden=\"true\" aria-label=\"X\" title=\"X\" ><svg role=\"img\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\"><title>X<\/title><path d=\"M18.901 1.153h3.68l-8.04 9.19L24 22.846h-7.406l-5.8-7.584-6.638 7.584H.474l8.6-9.83L0 1.154h7.594l5.243 6.932ZM17.61 20.644h2.039L6.486 3.24H4.298Z\"\/><\/svg><\/span><\/a><\/li><li><a aria-label=\"tumblr\" class=\"u-syndication syn-link\" href=\"https:\/\/www.tumblr.com\/blog\/view\/t:c4gTZash4jhfc6YyjwLx0A\/765904373322825728\"> <span class=\"syndication-link-icon svg-tumblr\" style=\"display: inline-block; max-width: 1rem; margin: 2px;\" aria-hidden=\"true\" aria-label=\"Tumblr\" title=\"Tumblr\" ><svg role=\"img\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\"><title>Tumblr<\/title><path d=\"M14.563 24c-5.093 0-7.031-3.756-7.031-6.411V9.747H5.116V6.648c3.63-1.313 4.512-4.596 4.71-6.469C9.84.051 9.941 0 9.999 0h3.517v6.114h4.801v3.633h-4.82v7.47c.016 1.001.375 2.371 2.207 2.371h.09c.631-.02 1.486-.205 1.936-.419l1.156 3.425c-.436.636-2.4 1.374-4.156 1.404h-.178l.011.002z\"\/><\/svg><\/span><\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/div><span class=\"kt-load-after-post\"><\/span>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>In my own experience, at my worst, I was alone. I made people uncomfortable because they didn&#8217;t know what to say or how to fix me. The truth was I didn&#8217;t need them to fix me. I needed them to treat me like they did before. They needed to talk to me about the ball game or the latest music they were listening to and stay connected to me somehow. I couldn&#8217;t speak to them about what I was going through, and I didn&#8217;t have the words to convey the pain I was in, but it would have done so much good to have someone remind me that I was still me, in the midst of all that.\u00a0<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":8018,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"mf2_syndication":[],"_kad_post_transparent":"default","_kad_post_title":"default","_kad_post_layout":"default","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"default","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"default","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"_kad_post_classname":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"webmentions_disabled_pings":false,"webmentions_disabled":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[35],"tags":[153,17,95,72],"class_list":["post-16333","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-links","tag-joy","tag-mentalhealth","tag-music","tag-support"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.3 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Sharing - What not to say to someone with mental health issues<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\/reviews\/2024\/10\/31\/sharing-what-not-to-say-to-someone-with-mental-health-issues\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Sharing - What not to say to someone with mental health issues\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"In my own experience, at my worst, I was alone. I made people uncomfortable because they didn&#039;t know what to say or how to fix me. The truth was I didn&#039;t need them to fix me. I needed them to treat me like they did before. They needed to talk to me about the ball game or the latest music they were listening to and stay connected to me somehow. I couldn&#039;t speak to them about what I was going through, and I didn&#039;t have the words to convey the pain I was in, but it would have done so much good to have someone remind me that I was still me, in the midst of all that.\u00a0\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\/reviews\/2024\/10\/31\/sharing-what-not-to-say-to-someone-with-mental-health-issues\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Survivors News and Reviews\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/mikemac29\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:author\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/mikemac29\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2024-11-01T01:05:41+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\/reviews\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/10\/54e8dd43435ba514f6da8c7dda793e7b143fd9e7574c704c722f7ad7904fc759_1280-e1573218739896.jpg?fit=500%2C333&ssl=1\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"500\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"333\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"MikeM\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@CA_Survivor\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@CA_Survivor\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"MikeM\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"2 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\\\/reviews\\\/2024\\\/10\\\/31\\\/sharing-what-not-to-say-to-someone-with-mental-health-issues\\\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\\\/reviews\\\/2024\\\/10\\\/31\\\/sharing-what-not-to-say-to-someone-with-mental-health-issues\\\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"MikeM\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\\\/reviews\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/dbc4a41a301b6455b3717df14ea3533e\"},\"headline\":\"Sharing &#8211; 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