{"id":19629,"date":"2025-10-01T07:25:01","date_gmt":"2025-10-01T12:25:01","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\/reviews\/?p=19629"},"modified":"2025-09-30T21:12:26","modified_gmt":"2025-10-01T02:12:26","slug":"sharing-healed-is-a-myth-and-marketing-tool","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\/reviews\/2025\/10\/01\/sharing-healed-is-a-myth-and-marketing-tool\/","title":{"rendered":"Sharing &#8211; Healed is a Myth and Marketing Tool"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class='__iawmlf-post-loop-links' style='display:none;' data-iawmlf-post-links='[{&quot;id&quot;:17,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;https:\\\/\\\/toddbaratz.substack.com\\\/p\\\/healed-is-a-myth-and-marketing-tool&quot;,&quot;archived_href&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;redirect_href&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;checks&quot;:[],&quot;broken&quot;:false,&quot;last_checked&quot;:null,&quot;process&quot;:&quot;done&quot;}]'><\/div>\n<p>Todd raises an interesting point, if you can get past the rather direct title.<\/p>\n<p>I know this is a topic I&#8217;ve written about previously, because I think many survivors have an incorrect definition of &#8220;healed.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>They don&#8217;t consider themselves healed until they are restored to the person they were before the abuse. As I <a href=\"https:\/\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\/reviews\/2024\/03\/27\/sharing-are-adult-survivors-of-child-abuse-ever-fully-healed\/\">said last year<\/a> about defining &#8220;healed&#8221; for yourself:<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>This is why I look for the definition when I read anything about being fully healed. What does being healed mean to you? Is your definition possible? A definition that includes the abuse having zero impact on who you are today? Because that\u2019s not realistic. But it also doesn\u2019t mean you can\u2019t go on to have a healed life while acknowledging that it is still part of who you are.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/toddbaratz.substack.com\/p\/healed-is-a-myth-and-marketing-tool\">https:\/\/toddbaratz.substack.com\/p\/healed-is-a-myth-and-marketing-tool<\/a><\/p>\n<p>Todd makes a valid point about there not being a &#8220;cure&#8221;:<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>Ask yourself better questions: not \u201cWhen will I be healed?\u201d but \u201cWhat would make today 5% calmer?\u201d Not \u201cHow do I never feel this again?\u201d but \u201cHow do I meet this feeling without abandoning myself?\u201d Not \u201cHow do I get over it?\u201d but \u201cHow do I carry it well?\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>So many survivors want the answer to that first question. They want to know when this will be over and done with, but that&#8217;s not realistic. It would be like me asking when I will be &#8220;healed&#8221; from diabetes. I won&#8217;t be. My disease is something that is part of me that I have to manage. I take medicine, I watch what I eat, I don&#8217;t drink, etc. That&#8217;s not going to end. I fully understand that there is no future version of me where I don&#8217;t have to do any of those things.<\/p>\n<p>Similarly, there is no future version of me that isn&#8217;t a survivor of child abuse. It happened. There is no cure I can buy that will create a version of me where I didn&#8217;t have that experience and be shaped by it. That&#8217;s not to say that I cannot have a great life, but I will always have a life impacted by those events.<\/p>\n<p>I do consider myself very much healed from my abuse, but make no mistake, that does not mean that it isn&#8217;t part of me every day. It took time and work to get there. Many people promise that they can heal you without it, and I would be extremely wary of them.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<div class=\"syndication-links\"><\/div><span class=\"kt-load-after-post\"><\/span>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>So many survivors want the answer to that first question. They want to know when this will be over and done with, but that&#8217;s not realistic. It would be like me asking when will I be &#8220;healed&#8221; from diabetes. I won&#8217;t be. My disease is something that is part of me that I have to manage. I take medicine, I watch what I eat, I don&#8217;t drink, etc. That&#8217;s not going to end. I fully understand that there is no future version of me where I don&#8217;t have to do any of those things.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>Similarly, there is no future version of me that isn&#8217;t a survivor of child abuse. It happened. There is no cure I can buy that will create a version of me where I didn&#8217;t have that experience and be shaped by it. That&#8217;s not to say that I cannot have a great life, but I will always have a life impacted by those events.\u00a0<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":15022,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"mf2_syndication":[],"_kad_post_transparent":"default","_kad_post_title":"default","_kad_post_layout":"default","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"default","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"default","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"_kad_post_classname":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"webmentions_disabled_pings":false,"webmentions_disabled":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[35],"tags":[37,47,38],"class_list":["post-19629","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-links","tag-abuse","tag-healing","tag-survivors"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.3 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Sharing - Healed is a Myth and Marketing Tool<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\/reviews\/2025\/10\/01\/sharing-healed-is-a-myth-and-marketing-tool\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Sharing - Healed is a Myth and Marketing Tool\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"So many survivors want the answer to that first question. They want to know when this will be over and done with, but that&#039;s not realistic. It would be like me asking when will I be &quot;healed&quot; from diabetes. I won&#039;t be. My disease is something that is part of me that I have to manage. I take medicine, I watch what I eat, I don&#039;t drink, etc. That&#039;s not going to end. I fully understand that there is no future version of me where I don&#039;t have to do any of those things.\u00a0  Similarly, there is no future version of me that isn&#039;t a survivor of child abuse. It happened. There is no cure I can buy that will create a version of me where I didn&#039;t have that experience and be shaped by it. That&#039;s not to say that I cannot have a great life, but I will always have a life impacted by those events.\u00a0\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\/reviews\/2025\/10\/01\/sharing-healed-is-a-myth-and-marketing-tool\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Survivors News and Reviews\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/mikemac29\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:author\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/mikemac29\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2025-10-01T12:25:01+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\/reviews\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/03\/fig-05-03-2024_03-41-29.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"500\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"300\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"MikeM\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@CA_Survivor\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@CA_Survivor\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"MikeM\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"2 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\\\/reviews\\\/2025\\\/10\\\/01\\\/sharing-healed-is-a-myth-and-marketing-tool\\\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\\\/reviews\\\/2025\\\/10\\\/01\\\/sharing-healed-is-a-myth-and-marketing-tool\\\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"MikeM\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.childabusesurvivor.net\\\/reviews\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/dbc4a41a301b6455b3717df14ea3533e\"},\"headline\":\"Sharing &#8211; 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