As we come to the end of another year many of us, myself included, look back at 2017 and recount the places we’ve been, the people we met, what we accomplished, what we didn’t, the people we’ve lost and start to plan to make 2018 even better.
There’s nothing wrong with that, quiet reflection is an important part of our lives, and if the new year becomes your reason to do that, great.
For me, 2017 has been a lot of change. One of the things I have had to accept this year is that not everything has a black and white answer. Survivors tend to think it those terms instead of the gray that real life throws at us. The changes I’ve seen this year have been in the gray, I have to admit. Not that I regret the new job, living in a new state, or the other changes that we have made. I don’t, but for all the new things that I am now enjoying, there are also things I miss because I’m not doing them anymore. That’s the gray. The good with the bad. That’s been 2017.
One other thing that 2017 has done, by bringing me back to a city that holds some not great memories, is remind me of the years where this reflection didn’t look so good. The years where I can honestly say the best thing that happened was that I didn’t die.
I know for some, that was this year. Looking back on 2017 might not feel all that great. Maybe just still being here to read this is reminding you that it wasn’t such a good year. That’s ok. You didn’t die, and that’s something.
You’re still here, still fighting. You should be proud of that.
Here’s to still being here and having something better to look back on in 2018, 2019, 2020, or however long it takes to see some progress in your healing. It will come.