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I found this book really helpful. It gave great advice for moms who are either currently being abused, or have escaped an abusive relationship. It helps them know how to help their kids heal everything they have experienced. It walks moms through how to deal with the court system, which can be really hostile to abused mothers. It talks about helping kids understand the manipulation their father tries to pull on them. Excellent resource.
http://www.amazon.com/When-Dad-Hurts-Mom-Witnessing/dp/0425200310