There is so much good advice that I don’t have anything to add, other than to remember how many children don’t tell anyone for years, if ever. This is why the topic is so important.
I’m going to let you all in on my secret. I rarely feel like I have it all together. I know many of you are in the same boat. We go to work and pretend like we do, and maybe this is why we all feel like we have impostor syndrome, too, because we don’t always feel the same as the other people who always have it together.
I bet you can think of two or three people you interact with every week that you consider to have it all together. I’d also bet that if we could get inside their minds, they don’t feel like they do, just like the rest of us.
Assuming that we know abusers when we see them is a dangerous game. Abusers get away with their behavior because they know how to mix in society, how to charm, and how to influence people to believe them. Victims often don’t have that going for them and are less likely to get the benefit of the doubt. Until we understand our biased thinking, we will continue to make this mistake, and. victims of abuse will be unlikely to be believed.
We know that kids who can access mental health support during traumatic childhoods fare significantly better in every aspect than kids who are unable to do so. If we want to do something about not only the youth mental health crisis, but also future adult mental and physical health issues, one of the best things we could do is invest in support systems for children.
But, we don’t. We have never made the kind of commitment that is necessary, and now we are cutting the meager programs that do exist.
Because if they don’t learn it from you, they will hear about it from these sources. Is that where you want your kids to learn about sex? If you wait too long, you’re not protecting their innocence as much as you are creating an opening for someone else to teach them a worse version.
Again, I’ll say it. You can’t solve the problems that exist and create risks for traumatized children when you don’t acknowledge the trauma. How can someone dealing with discrimination, hate, poverty, etc., get assistance when we won’t recognize that those things exist?
