It seems many parents want schools to do more in this space, which makes sense, because mental health issues only get worse when kids grow up without support.
One problem with blanket rules for everything is that there will always be a situation where the rule harms someone. Parental consent rules are one example. Sure, it’s great when parents are involved in their kids’ care. It’s ideal, even.
That assumes they have good parents, though. When the thing a kid needs protection against is the parent, you can’t demand the parent’s consent for that.
As a kid, I needed everything to be perfect, not because I was some overachiever. It was because I knew in my heart and body that anything that wasn’t right could create a violent situation. Any detail overlooked, any warning sign missed, or any wrong word could end up with me getting abused. It became a learned behavior like Pavlov’s dogs. Any mistake created anxiety and fear of repercussion.
As I’ve said many times, I want to teach people that it’s ok to reach out, which means that I also need to advocate for the resources to be available when someone does!
Why would a kid growing up in poverty, without enough food, and without the social support to succeed in school, feel any different about themselves as they enter adulthood? There’s a connection there; good mental health is hard to find when the entire world tells you you’re less-than.
Maybe we should stop viewing anyone as less-than and fight to make sure no kids go without.
My biggest epiphany in therapy was the freedom to make my own life moving forward, because I had never felt I was allowed to do so. Going back to the person I was before I was abused would not have been that.
After all, everyone is changing all the time. Trauma or not, people move forward in their lives and change. Going back isn’t a solution.
