Compassion

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    Study Shows That Limiting Your Life to Only “Positive” Friends May Be Hurting You

    ByMikeM Reading Time: 2 minutes

    As it turns out, tuning out people who might need some compassion is simply an act of isolation, and isolation is almost never good for our own mental health. By cutting out the people who don’t always offer up those positive vibes, we wind up disconnected and lonely. Which, of course, we can’t share with the people left around us, because we are all living in the nothing negative bubble, so you are now living a very isolated life, which leads to much MORE anxiety, stress, and depression. 

  • Sharing – Generosity and Happiness

    ByMikeM Reading Time: 2 minutes

    As the post below goes on to explain, it’s not just being generous financially that has this effect on us, it can also be giving time by volunteering, or helping out someone who can use it, cooking a meal for them, helping them clean, etc. All of these ways of giving to another human being helps that person, and it helps us. It’s good for us.

    The other thing I’d like for many survivors to consider is finding a way to be generous during the holidays especially when you are struggling with the holidays to start with. Yes, I’ve seen many, many folks already starting to dread the holidays. They are estranged from their families, expect to spend the holidays alone, etc. It sucks, I won’t lie about that. But, consider finding a way to be generous, as a way to make the holidays a bit less lonely. Volunteer at a soup kitchen, or another place that may be serving holiday meals. Hop online and offer to chat with other folks in a similar situation over the holidays, make plans to get outside of your own situation, and find a way to give to someone else, even if it’s nothing more than time.

    That might be the better option for the holidays compared to just waiting for them to be over if you can find a way to do it.

  • Sharing – Other People Don’t Think You’re a Mess

    ByMikeM Reading Time: 3 minutes

    The key is to have some compassion for yourself, similar to the compassion you might have for someone else in a vulnerable situation. When you can do that, suddenly what the other person does isn’t as important, you’ve given yourself grace, and acceptance.

    As childhood abuse survivors, of course, this is tricky. Self-compassion is not generally one of our strengths. How could it be? All our lives we’ve been told that bad things happen either to bad people, or for a reason, and we’ve had something horrible happen to us, so we must be broken in some way to have had that experience. Didn’t we all think that way at one point or another? How could we not?

  • Shared Links (weekly) Feb. 28 2021

    ByMikeM Reading Time: 1 minute

    The problem with perfect

    6 Happiness Books That Mental Health Experts Trust

    Make Social Media Work For (rather Than Against) Your Mental Health

    The Difference Between Self-Esteem, Self-Confidence, and Self-Compassion

    This Nonprofit Found A Unique Way To Help Sexually Abused Children Heal

    But They Went Willingly – Understanding Teen Sexual Grooming

    Mental Illness and Homelessness