That description of restlessness is familiar to me. That’s how I feel when I’m not engaged in learning something. That’s why I remain curious about the things I care about and why I share so much here and elsewhere online. It’s a motivation for me to continue learning, and that, in turn, helps my mental health.
It’s self-care for me.
As I’ve mentioned before, I didn’t wait until my 40s or 50s to tell someone about my abuse, and my family found out about it in my 20s, primarily due to my roommate having to answer their questions about my mental health breakdown. I didn’t get to choose whether my parents found out, but I’m also thankful that he went ahead and had that difficult conversation with them. I needed them to know what happened so that they could be part of my life while I tried to heal my mental health.
On the other hand, I would be lying if I said everything in the family was great after that. It’s complicated and occasionally messy.
It’s no wonder that I felt alone. I was alone. I was also lucky in finding someone else who was willing to tell their secret in my 20s. Most survivors remain alone with their trauma for decades. Even when they go about their lives, marry, have families, etc., they live alone in their trauma. Others tried to tell someone and weren’t believed, which is a level of being alone that I cannot imagine.
If you’re like me and don’t want to be open to lengthy conversations with strangers, this article is good news. Even small connections, a smile, a nod, or a pleasant “hello,” have mental health benefits.
It might also remind us of the humanity of the people around us. There are worse things.
The question isn’t just about making therapy available to more people, though that is important. It’s also about eliminating the environmental factors that cause harm to our mental health. Those will vary depending on where we live. What works in Louisiana is not what works in New York. What is needed here is different because the environment is different.
Most of all, can we even see the issues as they apply to different places? If we can’t see that, how do we see the problems faced by any individual?
There is so much good advice that I don’t have anything to add, other than to remember how many children don’t tell anyone for years, if ever. This is why the topic is so important.
