A Recurring Theme

posted in: Child Abuse | 2

One of the recurring themes I noticed in the holiday edition of the Blog Carnival was in the area of how to deal with the holidays as a survivor. More than one post talked specifically about making new traditions. It’s very easy to regret the Christmas traditions that we either didn’t have, or were not very good traditions, as children. It’s very easy to look upon the holidays with disgust, as other families have their traditions and celebrations, as we continue to sruggle with the issues surrounding our own childhoods. It can be a terribly difficult time for survivors, there’s no doubt about that.

On the other hand, each holiday season is another opportunity to start, or continue, or own traditions. They don’t have to be Norman Rockwell type traditions, nor do they need to be anything big. It can be as simple as spending the day doing good things for yourself, or spending a quiet day with someone who is helping support you, or someone you love. Whatever it is, make this holiday season about doing something for you, not about regretting the things you don’t have.

You’ve lost enough holiday “joy” to the abuse, let this year be the year you start to find your own, small, joys.

Update, of course, right on cue, Pysch Central’s 9 Tips for Busting Holiday Depression also includes a tipe about making your own traditions, taking control over how you celebrate the holidays…

2 Responses

  1. Madison Tomlinson

    My dad survived an abuse-filled childhood.
    And yet, he raised me, my sister and brother with zero repercussions of his past, which is odd.
    I did not understand what he went through, until I went through his past, with my mom’s help, and HAD to deal with it.
    A friend posted my story, (his story), on a few different web pages.
    I still only see the survivor, not the victim.
    Which I think he appreciates most of all.

    Read our family story here:
    http://activerain.com/blogsview/849452/A-Great-Christmas-Story-Worth-Passsing-OnPlease-Pass-It-On-Too

    Someone needs it this Christmas
    Madison

  2. Erin Merryn

    Loved the post. Check out my Christmas post on reflecting on the fond memories of childhood and not dwelling on the pain that happened.

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