The Cast

tumblr_mr1214xpN21sc2aruo1_540Pin

 

I saw this over the weekend while window shopping, and it struck me as something very appropriate for my life. I spent a lot of time trying to figure out the plot, why things happened, why my childhood was what it was, why I was the way I was, etc. In all that time, I forgot that the plot wasn’t the important part; it was the cast of characters around me. I realized that healing, for me, was about becoming a better person, a better husband, a better friend, and so on. If there aren’t people around me who inspire me to do those things, it’s much less likely to happen.

When I surround myself with negative, toxic people, trying to be a better person can be ridiculously difficult. It adds yet another hurdle to healing. On the other hand, when I’m surrounded by positive, encouraging people, not only do I have the support I need, but I also have people whom I want to emulate. I see examples of thoughtfulness, kindness, and caring that I can learn from. I see work ethics and attitudes that I want to have myself.

Luckily, I can look around me now and know that the cast of my movie is full of these kinds of people. My wife and my friends are positive influences on me, each in their way. I may not be sure where the plot is going from here, but I know with this cast, it’s going to be good.

Similar Posts

  • |

    Why Did So Many Adults Minimize the Abuse in US Gymnastics?

    So, when I look at a highly successful program like US gymnastics, like Penn State football, like USA Swimming, like English Youth Football, etc. I think we can clearly see this. Why be such a downer, don’t you see how much good this program, and the people in it, are doing? It’s probably nothing, just some misunderstanding by over-imaginative kids. Nothing to worry about, look at the success we are having in the field, gym, or water. That’s what this is all about. That’s the important thing. The rest of this will pass.

    Except in the case of US Gymnastics, these ladies, and dozens of others, have not simply let it pass. They have remained steadfast in talking about it, making sure they can do everything they can to make sure it doesn’t happen to the next generation and reminding all of us that winning at all costs, is not worth the damage that is done to children who are sexually abused.

    They are truly resilient, like many of us who have survived sexual abuse, and gone on to talk about it, share our own stories, and live our adult lives. But never confuse that resiliency with how hard it really is to do. Never look at a survivor who has appeared to overcome their abuse, and assume that it’s ok to diminish what happened to them. It’s never easy, and for each one who might appear to have overcome, I’ll show you 5 who are still struggling every single day. You’ll find many of them in prison, or mental health care centers. Still dealing with the aftermath of their childhood trauma without access to the same support and resources that we lucky few have had the privilege to have. Yet they are all human beings, and they were all children once, children who had to suffer at the hands of adults who were more interested in their own pleasures, comfort, and place in their society than they were to consider the damage being done to these children.

    Don’t be one of those adults. There are many ways to abuse a child. Larry Nassar did and is paying for his crimes, finally. But there were a whole lot of other adults who abused these girls, by not taking it seriously, not investigating, and not caring enough about them as human beings to protect them. Make no mistake about that.

  • |

    Let the Fault Lie Where it Should

    I was thinking earlier this week about why many victims of child abuse, or domestic violence, continue to believe they deserved what happened to them. One of the themes I very often see is actually immaturity. The reason I say that is, immature people see themselves as the center of everything that happens, mature people…

  • World Suicide Prevention Day 2021

    So, the thing I want us to talk about this year is not just encouragement to call a hotline or to reach out to a friend for help, or even to tell our stories and erase the stigma around mental health issues. I want us to consider doing more than that. I want us, as a society, to figure out how to provide hope. As much value as there is in all of those other things if I can’t provide some hope that things will get better, that we are working and advocating for things to get better across all areas of our culture, then I can’t honestly say that there is a reason for someone to hope, and at the end of the day, the thing that truly prevented me from taking my own life when I was at my worst, was the hope that life wouldn’t always be that painful.

    As it turned out, my life wasn’t always that painful, and even in times of pain, I can look back and remember that.

    How do we provide that hope for others who have been beaten down and worn out with life right now? Where does their hope come from?

  • Sometimes, things really do just happen

    I talked recently about how little other people typically think about you, and how that should be a freeing things. Also, just how difficult it can be to accept that because, let’s face it, we all see the world through our own perspective, and that perspective is utterly and completely focused on ourselves. So, it’s…

7 Comments

  1. This is so true. Like you I never stopped to think about it before and this is exactly how my life was. Even today, I can be surrounded by negative people and start to take it in before I realize that I don’t have to take in their negativity. It isn’t mine. Today because of my healing work, I can choose to be positive. Life is so much better when I do.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

To respond on your own website, enter the URL of your response which should contain a link to this post's permalink URL. Your response will then appear (possibly after moderation) on this page. Want to update or remove your response? Update or delete your post and re-enter your post's URL again. (Find out more about Webmentions.)