The takeaway, of course, is that we should believe survivors when they talk about their trauma; they do know what they are talking about. Secondly, maybe we should stop trying to convince ourselves that young children will move past it and likely not even remember it when they’re an adult.
That’s not how trauma works.
When you’re a child, everything is about routines and certainty. Waking up every day and having food to eat, adults who love you and care for you, education, friends, etc. Growing up in an environment where none of that is certain is similar to growing up with traumatic events.Â
Resilience comes from the confidence that, even if things go horribly wrong, you’ll still be here, moving on. What I think young people are missing today is examples of that. One, because we don’t like to talk about the 100 times we struggled with something before figuring it out, but also because we live in a society that mocks people who try and fail at anything. When we go online, how often do we see the perfect finished product rather than the failures someone lived through to get there? And, even if someone shows the failures, how often is the comments section filled with mockery?Â
It’s no wonder the thing young adults struggle with more than anything is perfectionism. We’ve created a world that expects it.Â
That’s sometimes the price we pay for speaking out. It’s not an easy price to pay, but let’s not kid ourselves that it doesn’t exist.
It exists, and as long as it does, there will remain thousands upon thousands of people out there who never talk about their abuse, but still need some of us out here talking so they know they are not alone.
This program is making a difference for veterans, and I have no doubt it would be the sme for many: The Safety Planning Intervention is a structured process that involves six distinct steps. A healthcare provider and a patient work collaboratively to identify personal warning signs that a crisis might be developing. They also outline…
These actions aren’t just specific actions that protect children; they’re the kinds of actions that come naturally when kids have an adult actively involved in their lives every day, the kind of involvement that would notice a nervous pause before answering, an odd comment that seems out of character, a small detail in a story about other people.Â
