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Sharing – Other People Don’t Think You’re a Mess
The key is to have some compassion for yourself, similar to the compassion you might have for someone else in a vulnerable situation. When you can do that, suddenly what the other person does isn’t as important, you’ve given yourself grace, and acceptance.
As childhood abuse survivors, of course, this is tricky. Self-compassion is not generally one of our strengths. How could it be? All our lives we’ve been told that bad things happen either to bad people, or for a reason, and we’ve had something horrible happen to us, so we must be broken in some way to have had that experience. Didn’t we all think that way at one point or another? How could we not?
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Shared Links (weekly) October 31, 2021
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Kurtis Gabriel, his fight with mental health, and why talking about it matters
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Marginalized Mental Health Matters: What Experts Want You to Know
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Understaffed State Psychiatric Facilities Leave Mental Health Patients in Limbo
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How stigma prevents people from accessing mental health care and what can be done about it
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Suicide Prevention Is a Million Caring Acts Far Before Crisis Intervention
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Sharing – 5 Powerful Self-Care Tips for Abuse and Trauma Survivors
How often do I see survivors talking about being healed as if there’s some end where they are done and never have to think about the trauma again, and berating themselves for not having yet reached this state when it doesn’t really work that way. Self-care and learning never stop. We never reach a point where we know everything and live happily ever after. Real-life does not have a happily ever after, it has ups, downs, twists, and turns, and healing will not be any different.
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Sharing – Trauma Healing Requires A Certain Amount Of Privilege
She lists out things like having insurance, having financial security, having a partner and friends from who she doesn’t have to hide her therapy sessions, etc.
As we just talked about yesterday, the reason less than half of all people dealing with mental health issues actually get any treatment at all is because they don’t have all of these things.
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Sharing – Why Healing from Trauma Can Get Harder As We Age
As I’ve said before, we were too busy simply surviving the abuse to learn the things we were supposed to learn as children, so we often start out behind in various ways.
Of course, in order to learn those things we need to do the work as an adult, to first unlearn the things we learned, and then learn the things we didn’t learn to start with. This is, perhaps, one of the real tragedies of so many survivors not even telling anyone, let alone starting this work, for decades.
That’s so many more years of doing the things we need to unlearn, and undoing that is just going to be more difficult the longer this has been true for us. So, what can we do?
