What I was, however, during this experience, was engrossed in interacting with the animal and learning about it from the keeper. I wasn’t thinking about work, politics, or anything else, just being in the moment with my mind fully engaged in that one thing.
That is what is missing for many of us, and it’s absolutely leading to burnout, stress, and mental health issues.
I could not heal until I unlearned that my abuse was something I somehow caused. Unlearning that opened up the possibility of learning something different, namely, that I was abused because someone decided to abuse me. Did that happen overnight? Of course not! Unlearning is a process, and the more closely we identify with a belief, the more difficult it becomes to unlearn it. So many survivors learn at a very early age to keep secrets, that bad things will happen if they tell anyone.
People who’ve never had that belief drilled into their young minds wonder why victims wait decades to come forward and tell their stories. That’s why! That belief is hard to unlearn. Many of us grew up with silence being the thing that prevents the abuse from being worse. Why should we start discussing it? If you tried to tell someone as a child and got shut down, this only gets worse.
What’s objectionable? Who decides that? Does an abusive parent get to decide that no one should provide any information about abuse to their kid? Do ultra-religious parents get to decide that no one should see information about LGBTQ issues or mental health medication? Do non-religious parents get to decide that no one is allowed to read the Bible online due to violent passages?
It appears the answer to that, at least until a court steps in to strike down this law, is yes to all of that. As the EFF points out, this isn’t just a risk to the big tech platforms. Anyone with a blog, website, social media account, etc., is subject to a civil lawsuit based on a parent not agreeing with what they post.
More importantly, though, is to understand what we say to each other because, as someone who was abused as a child and dealt with severe depression for years, I know what it’s like when people around you see you as less-than. I know what it feels like to feel that way internally, and that is part of the abuse and depression, but it was also part of society that told me that. The part that got uncomfortable any time I was around, or who gets on podcasts and blogs to talk about the damaged goods that abuse survivors are, or mocks “crazy people.” The solution to that is not to find another group that you consider to be beneath you; it’s to see the value in every life. To recognize the humanity in all of us and make political decisions that lift the humanity in all of us.
As I have said many times, solving the mental health issues that plague the US will involve a lot of hard work, difficult conversations, and measured steps to create positive impacts for all of us. Adults need to be adults and have mature discussions about how to help as many suffering people as possible.
What we’re seeing from our government now is anything but adults being mature.
You are my online community, and while your numbers might not be as large as the number of followers I had on other platforms, I’m not worried about how this platform will change and become dangerous to any of you. This platform, MY platform, is safe for survivors, for those of you with mental health struggles, and for those of you dealing with illness, oppression, hatred, and discrimination. There are no shareholders to be beholden to, no one tracking you, no ads. There’s nothing here but one guy reminding you all that you are not alone.
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