Asking for help

I was having a conversation the other day, trying to explain why being embarrassed about asking for help is such a “guy” thing, when the reality struck me dead in the face.

Society really tells us that men are independent and don’t need help, and I’ve often wondered if this isn’t the reason men, generally, seek treatment for depression less often than women do. I think it is, I know it was one of the reasons it took me so long to ask for help when I was suffering. Looking back, I might have avoided some really messy stuff if I had the courage then to ask for help. I don’t think not asking was the strong, courageous thing to do, I think it was the cowardly thing to do. Standing up, and admitting that you need help, takes more courage than sitting quietly by while your life wastes away.

I would hate to think that any one of my friends was afraid to ask me for help because they were afraid of me seeing them as anything less than strong. I would hope they would understand that, from where I’ve been, not helping when I could, or mocking someone who needed help, who be the height of hypocrisy. I know better. Let’s hope more people learn that.

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One Comment

  1. Good thread

    I had to ask for help after two failed suicide attempts as if I hadnt I would have tried a third time or drunk myslef to death. I disclosed and started to get better and boy is life good despite the fact that my abuser is being released on parole next week after serving only half of his sentance. Justice dont make me laugh.

    I relive my abuse very nearly every night still and I’m now 49 but im sober and clean and dealing with it all, I never would have got this far if I had not disclosed I would have not started my recovery and there would be a great proberbility that i would not be here. CSA is a life and death issue

    A very angry Dan

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