Asking for help

I was having a conversation the other day, trying to explain why being embarrassed about asking for help is such a “guy” thing, when the reality struck me dead in the face.

Society really tells us that men are independent and don’t need help, and I’ve often wondered if this isn’t the reason men, generally, seek treatment for depression less often than women do. I think it is, I know it was one of the reasons it took me so long to ask for help when I was suffering. Looking back, I might have avoided some really messy stuff if I had the courage then to ask for help. I don’t think not asking was the strong, courageous thing to do, I think it was the cowardly thing to do. Standing up, and admitting that you need help, takes more courage than sitting quietly by while your life wastes away.

I would hate to think that any one of my friends was afraid to ask me for help because they were afraid of me seeing them as anything less than strong. I would hope they would understand that, from where I’ve been, not helping when I could, or mocking someone who needed help, who be the height of hypocrisy. I know better. Let’s hope more people learn that.

Similar Posts

  • A week?

    Gee has it really been a whole week since I posted anything here? That can only mean one thing, I’ve been living on the logical, analytical side non stop lately! Actually I have been. Between job hunting, holidays, working, and playing with a bunch of beta software in order to increase my skill set, I’ve…

  • The US, where being homeless could be a crime.

    You could argue that the outcome will be a large number of people with mental health issues crammed into a massively overburdened prison system with almost no hope of ever getting out. (Where would they go? Back to being homeless and thus getting arrested again.) 

    We’ve tried that with serious mental illness, and it doesn’t work. It fixes nothing unless you think lots of people with mental health issues dying in prison is the answer. I prefer that most of us are not that callous and uncaring. But most of us aren’t writing these laws and upholding them. That’s for the elite few with power, and I’m not as convinced they would care about anyone with a mental health struggle because they surely don’t do much to provide resources and assistance to struggling people. 

  • The shell is in place

    I managed to get all the content from the old site that I wanted to move, moved over the weekend. The “shell” of the site is in place so now I begin working on additions to the content. The layout is going to remain as is, for now. I’m happy with the simple look and…

One Comment

  1. Good thread

    I had to ask for help after two failed suicide attempts as if I hadnt I would have tried a third time or drunk myslef to death. I disclosed and started to get better and boy is life good despite the fact that my abuser is being released on parole next week after serving only half of his sentance. Justice dont make me laugh.

    I relive my abuse very nearly every night still and I’m now 49 but im sober and clean and dealing with it all, I never would have got this far if I had not disclosed I would have not started my recovery and there would be a great proberbility that i would not be here. CSA is a life and death issue

    A very angry Dan

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

To respond on your own website, enter the URL of your response which should contain a link to this post's permalink URL. Your response will then appear (possibly after moderation) on this page. Want to update or remove your response? Update or delete your post and re-enter your post's URL again. (Find out more about Webmentions.)