Better in 2006

As I’ve discussed before, I’ve spent years working on simply being better instead of making new year’s resolutions. I figure that’s it’s better to concentrate on the goal of being a better person every day than it is to make resolutions that go away after a few weeks. I’ve worked, with some success, and continue to work on being a better husband, writer, friend, and worker. I try to make better decisions, make better use of my time, and keep learning, but this year it’s become clear that one area of life has always been more difficult than others when it came to being better, and that was working toward being better physically. I’ve found this area to be a problem for many abuse survivors, though I’m not sure why.

Over the last few years of being married and happy, I’ve put on some weight, there’s no denying that. My wife’s job at the university alumni association afforded us the ability to purchase a sports and recreation pass to use all of their facilities, which offer a vast number of options for getting exercise. (Everything from a lap pool, cardio equipment, weight training, to dodge ball sessions.) We decided to sign up for this quarter and see whether we could keep up a regular schedule of workouts before signing up for a whole year. So far, we went twice over the weekend and are planning on going again tonight. I even weighed myself the first night we were there, which was scary. I haven’t weighed myself in years, and I weigh even more than I thought I did, which is unsettling, but now at least I have a way to measure my progress. Here’s hoping we can be diligent and I can make some progress!

Similar Posts

  • It’s still not safe to be honest

    The question isn’t about sharing or not sharing, it’s about why we, as a society, tolerate the haters. Why, in a stadium full of tens of thousands of fans, did he have to take that on by himself? How many people heard someone tell a fellow human being to kill themselves and laughed? 

    How many people heard it or read about it and decided against asking for help? How many of them will we lose? 

  • Survivor – Know Thyself

    Recently, I came across an article about how common happiness boosters might actually make you feel worse, and as I read it, I realized that, really, even though some of these can be mood boosters or stress relievers, for some people, they simply aren’t. It’s obvious from the article that the author is very aware of what works…

  • How Do We Get Out of the Advocacy Bubble?

    If what I do sounds descriptive of how you live your own online life, than let me challenge you. Find a post that resonates with you, on either blog, and share it with your network. Or, share this post with a personal note about how child abuse, or mental illness, has touched your life with your network. Not just with the folks you already interact with about these topics, but outside of that.

    And then continue to look for ways to reach beyond the bubble of the online survivor community. Because there are survivors and people dealing with mental health problems all around us, and there are also those who remain uneducated about those topics all around us as well.

  • |

    There Are Lots of People “Not Like You” and That’s Fine

    I was reading an article recently written by college professor Rupert W Nacoste Ph.D. on Psychology Today’s website. In it, he talks about a student who suggested he include mental health conditions as an example of neo-diversity. It’s an interesting article, on a couple of levels. First, the reality of how much we can negatively…

  • |

    Grief is Hard, and Long

    Something else interests me about grief though and that is the grief that child abuse survivors have because it’s complicated. We aren’t grieving a person we’ve lost, we’re grieving something we never had. A safe, happy childhood or a loving parental relationship that didn’t exist. The lack of any kind of family bonds as an adult, or the inability to trust anyone. Those are things we can, and should, grieve. Often we aren’t given the chance to do that. Other people expect us to “put it behind us” because it was a long time ago. We may even convince ourselves that the best option is to suck it up and forget it, no reason to think about any of that. But, I think there’s a reason to grieve the things we didn’t have as children. They are very real losses. They have very real impacts on our brains and our emotional well-being. We can’t change it now, but we can allow ourselves the freedom to feel grief over it. It’s part of the process. 

3 Comments

  1. It is good to see that you have come so far to be content and happy with your life. We all deserve that.

    Wishing you much happiness in all the days to follow. Sending you support and peace.

    Tina

  2. How nice of you to link to my blog. If ok, I would like to link your blog on mine as well. Your writings have been insightful and inspirational.

    Tina

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

To respond on your own website, enter the URL of your response which should contain a link to this post's permalink URL. Your response will then appear (possibly after moderation) on this page. Want to update or remove your response? Update or delete your post and re-enter your post's URL again. (Find out more about Webmentions.)