Gambling on the Future

posted in: Child Abuse, Observations | 3

 

Many survivors like to think they know what their future holds, and many of them end up being correct, because they spend so much time trying to control their life that they don’t ever really experience any big changes.

I’m here to tell you, however, that is no way to live. If there is one thing I know, it’s that I don’t know what the future holds with any certainty. I never planned to be where I am now, professionally, personally, or geographically, but I have enjoyed the ride. No it hasn’t been perfect, there have been hurdles, and disappointments, but I have been able to do things, and go places, that I never dreamed of.

At some point I had to look at my recovery and decide to spin the wheel and see where it landed. To accept that I couldn’t control everything, but that I also was not doomed to a future of nothing but unhappiness. No survivor is doomed to that.

Let me repeat that, no survivor, not one of you, is doomed to live out a horrible life. Many of us seem to think that is true. We expect bad things to happen and seemingly attract bad things, and people, to ourselves. It doesn’t have to be that way. The future is absolutely, completely, unknowable. If you think you are not capable of healing, or ever finding any joy in your life, you are wrong. You are capable.

The fact of the matter is, the roulette wheel of your future is spinning. Letting it land where it lands is a risk. Pretending that it isn’t spinning? You’re right, that’s not a risk. Risks have rewards, living a life convinced there’s no hope, does not. We know where that leads, and you don’t deserve that. You deserve to spin your own future.

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