This article makes some interesting points, which I’m going to oversimplify with this quote, so please go read the whole thing –
“Positive thinking – “The past is the past and I just have to look forward”—only underscores the idea that there’s nothing to be done about the effects the past had on you. That’s just not true. Therapy, as well as self-help, can change things for the better.
Sometimes, a dose of realism is actually what we need to make real changes in our lives. Drink up!”
We tend to think of survivors as negative thinkers, and let’s face it, many of us are. We assume the worst, and have a hard time seeing the positive. But, as described in this article, sometimes “positive thinking” can seem like an encouragement to simply “get over it”, and that’s just a ridiculous thing to think about childhood abuse. No, I think realism may be the correct balance here. Yes, what happened was horrible and requires some work to heal from, but you can heal from it.