Sharing – What happens after you tell your story? That’s a story in itself
Eva makes a valid point here:
“This is where we are all memoirists, encouraged to speak up, speak loudly, go deep, own our shame, post our tears on Instagram, ask for help. And then, what? Sometimes it is liberating. Sometimes it’s necessary. But sometimes it leaves a person feeling worse and less heard than before they spoke, whether that’s because they then get lost in the waiting lists and crumbling infrastructure of modern healthcare, or because the people they talked to didn’t react in a way that was helpful. Those writing memoirs or being interviewed on TV don’t have a choice about who hears their story, but the rest of us do. And while showing vulnerability can be important, it’s crucial to be cautious and sensible about who we are vulnerable to. This bit gets lost sometimes I think, in the modern rush to share our feelings.”
This is something I’ve talked about before as well. When sharing our stories as abuse survivors, we need to think about what happens afterward. I’ve told people to share when they are ready, and they are ready when they can handle any response that the person they are sharing with might give them. Be careful selecting who you share with, and be thoughtful about how much you want to share and give them space to react the way they need to.
And if you feel strongly that you want to write a book, start a site like this, and hit social media and tell the world, make sure you are prepared for all of it. Because once it’s out, you don’t control it any longer.
Once you’re sure though, tell your story for all the people who aren’t ready yet.