Shared Links (weekly) Feb. 9, 2025

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  • Sharing – Allowing Survivors of Suicide Loss to Be Honest

    As Brandy shares, processing grief can sometimes mean being angry, or feeling things about the death of a loved one that don’t always jive with how we’d want suicide reported, but these are not spokespeople, advocates, or reporters, they are people dealing with their own pain.

    Maybe, if we want people to speak their truth, we need to give them the room to express it the way they feel it, not silence them in the interest of not hearing terms we don’t love.

  • Sharing – The Emerging Science of Suicide Prevention

    I’m not a researcher but these two facts make me wonder if there’s not something we can do.

    If we have a list of “nudges” that can help people feel like they belong or help educate people about things like safety plans, etc. and we don’t know who is at risk and which nudge might help them, maybe we should just continue to generally be kind to the people around us. That means trying to understand what makes them feel supported, connected, etc., and doing those things consistently. It also means noticing if a “nudge” has the opposite effect, and trying something different instead.

    Help people feel like they belong, educate people about prevention resources, help them stay connected to family and friends, involve them, accept them, etc.

    Help your friends and loved ones by communicating the kinds of things that help you. When you feel disconnected or like you are a burden, what can they do to keep you connected? What things do they do that make it worse?

    When we don’t talk about these things we only make it worse, and we only continue to lose more people. We have to learn how to have these conversations. We have to be open to listening to the people closest to us and connecting to them without stigma and judgment. The researchers will keep working to learn more about prevention, but in the meantime simply caring about each other and being honest with each other is the best tool we have. We should use it.

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    Reading – When worry is good: Talking to your child about sexual abuse

    If you won’t, someone else might talk to them about sexual abuse, and convince them there’s nothing wrong with it. Who would you rather talk to your kids? When worry is good: Talking to your child about sexual abuse

  • This Week’s Links (weekly)

    Study shows men just as likely to be depressed as women tags: CA On Marrying a Survivor of Childhood Sexual Abuse – Shonna Milliken Humphrey – The Atlantic tags: CA How to Find Someone to Talk to When You Can’t Afford Therapy tags: CA 5 Ways to Help a Depressed Friend tags: CA Posted from…

  • Link – What is the Invisible Cage of Abuse?

    “During an experience of abuse, your resourceful young self used coping strategies to try and protect yourself from the pain. These behaviors served you at the time. They were your army of protection against the abuse. However, when you continue to use these behaviors as an adult, you become your own eternal jailer. These strategies,…

  • Taylor Swift, Deepfake Porn and the Law

    As the article explains, there is no federal law against this in the US. There are some state laws, but they’re not very effective. The problem is that we’ve always treated sexual abuse materials as criminal because, as the saying goes, behind every photo is a child being abused. With deepfakes, though, the abuse isn’t happening. So when a teen girl is the subject of deepfake porn, she was never sexually assaulted, so there’s no crime.

    There’s a lot of harm, though. In the case of a celebrity, it might be reputational harm. In the case of teenagers, that fake can turn into blackmail, bullying, and all the mental health issues that go along with that. (The same is true of adults, but we know how vulnerable teens are to this and how this too often ends.)

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