• Sharing – Your Burnout Is Unique. Your Recovery Will Be, Too.

    ByMikeM Reading Time: 2 minutes

    As the authors point out, your approach to self-care should be different depending on what is causing the burnout. If you’re just exhausted from a lack of sleep, overwork, etc. taking a day to rest, relax, and take care of yourself might be the best thing you can do for yourself. (Recognizing, as mentioned above, that if you’re overworked, fixing that falls on other people and the company) On the other hand, if you’re burned out from watching the news, and developing really a very cynical outlook of other people. spending a day isolating yourself from social connections even further, might not really be the best option. So, self care starts to look a little different depending on not only your own individual preferences, but also what it is that is causing these feelings of burnout. 

    Of course, the struggle here is knowing yourself, and your emotions.

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    Sharing – What to do when you find CSAM or evidence of child sex trafficking online

    ByMikeM Reading Time: 1 minute

    Whatever the motivation, that’s not the appropriate thing to do. The article below walks through the steps of reporting it to the platform where you saw it, and also reporting it to the proper law enforcement agencies. Those are the places who can actually investigate this, not your friends and groups.

    Please, keep this in mind, and keep this handy.

  • Sharing – Is it really OK to not be OK?

    ByMikeM Reading Time: 1 minute

    The article below is about the UK, where NHS funding determines how much mental health treatment is available, and when too many people need it, someone has to decide who does, and doesn’t. Usually that means people who aren’t “sick enough”, get nothing, and continue to get worse.

    Can we say the same isn’t true in other countries? In the US, we have a severe shortage of mental health resources and funding too. Maybe there’s not a government agency determining who is “sick enough”, but there are plenty of obstacles to getting care that leave you with similar results. You’re not sick enough to be a priority, you’re not insured enough to get treatment, you’re not wealthy enough to get private care, and on and on.

  • Sharing – How my Facebook post about suicide uncovered so much hidden male pain and suffering

    ByMikeM Reading Time: 2 minutes

    I have managed to be somewhat successful by society’s standard. I am also a survivor of childhood sexual abuse. To assume that must mean I wasn’t that hurt by it, is to tell me that you know nothing of my life, or the lives of thousands of other men like me. Is it any wonder so many don’t come forward and talk about it?

    But, as the article below points out, there are too many men in pain, with nowhere to go, for us to not talk about it. They deserve better.

  • Sharing – How to Heal Childhood Trauma Without Forgiving the Person Who Caused It

    ByMikeM Reading Time: 2 minutes

    If you choose to forgive, know that it is your choice, including what forgiveness means to you. I’ve talked to many survivors who have made that choice, and how they define forgiveness isn’t always the same Know, however, that it absolutely does not mean you have to now be silent and never bring it up again, and know that people who desire your silence, are not your allies.

    I will agree with Roseanna about that, it’s not about forgiveness, it’s about healing.

  • Sharing – Acknowledging Limits – Helping Others

    ByMikeM Reading Time: 2 minutes

    One of the things I immediately recommend to anyone asking about starting a blog like mine is to set your boundaries. If you don’t, you’ll burn out and be gone within 6 months. Decide what you will say, what you won’t, and how much time you’ll dedicate to writing for the blog and interacting with people online. Because if you don’t you’ll find yourself unable to cope and you’ll bail on it.

    I’d say the same thing about anything. Yes, be with someone who needs support, but set your boundaries around it, and make sure you are still taking care of your own life. Because the only thing worse than someone not sitting and listening to a friend or loved one when they are struggling, is having some do it for a while, and then disappear. That doesn’t do anyone any good. We all need you to be well just as much as we need you to stick with relationships when someone is dealing with healing, or mental health issues.

    Set your boundaries, and be willing to stick to them, lovingly. As Liz says in her piece, it’s not about you doing everything, it’s about you pointing them to a whole host of options for support. That is what being a good support system is all about.