Someone left this in a comment:
I’ve found that feeling nothing is *usually* worse than being happy and sometimes having it taken away.
You know, that’s something that doesn’t get talked about a whole lot, but I would like to discuss further. Yes having emotional pain is terrible, and can be quite unpleasant, to say the least, but it’s part of life. The good and bad emotions we feel are what makes us human and what makes life, well, life. I spent a good many years trying to perfect the art of “feeling nothing”, and got pretty damn close at that. But it didn’t make my life ok, it made it nonexistant. Feeling nothing meant being nothing and experiencing nothing. I imagine it’s about as close to just being dead as I could get without actually dying. In a way it’s the same sort of solution that suicide is. You feel pain, the pain is temporary, and you go for a permanent solution. All of life is not pain, no matter how hard you try to convince yourself of that, and dying, be it physically or just emotionally, negates the ability to have any sort of happiness in your life, ever. Doesn’t sound like a fair trade to me.