So, when I look at a highly successful program like US gymnastics, like Penn State football, like USA Swimming, like English Youth Football, etc. I think we can clearly see this. Why be such a downer, don’t you see how much good this program, and the people in it, are doing? It’s probably nothing, just some misunderstanding by over-imaginative kids. Nothing to worry about, look at the success we are having in the field, gym, or water. That’s what this is all about. That’s the important thing. The rest of this will pass.
Except in the case of US Gymnastics, these ladies, and dozens of others, have not simply let it pass. They have remained steadfast in talking about it, making sure they can do everything they can to make sure it doesn’t happen to the next generation and reminding all of us that winning at all costs, is not worth the damage that is done to children who are sexually abused.
They are truly resilient, like many of us who have survived sexual abuse, and gone on to talk about it, share our own stories, and live our adult lives. But never confuse that resiliency with how hard it really is to do. Never look at a survivor who has appeared to overcome their abuse, and assume that it’s ok to diminish what happened to them. It’s never easy, and for each one who might appear to have overcome, I’ll show you 5 who are still struggling every single day. You’ll find many of them in prison, or mental health care centers. Still dealing with the aftermath of their childhood trauma without access to the same support and resources that we lucky few have had the privilege to have. Yet they are all human beings, and they were all children once, children who had to suffer at the hands of adults who were more interested in their own pleasures, comfort, and place in their society than they were to consider the damage being done to these children.
Don’t be one of those adults. There are many ways to abuse a child. Larry Nassar did and is paying for his crimes, finally. But there were a whole lot of other adults who abused these girls, by not taking it seriously, not investigating, and not caring enough about them as human beings to protect them. Make no mistake about that.
for one thing it seems to me that all of the stats on victims becomming abusers are taken from those who abuse. in fact i have yet to see a predator get caught and not use the abuse excuse. why should we believe anything they say? information given by people who made a life out of deception should be seen for what it is an attempt to escape blame . by using the very crime they comitted as an excuse ,its an insult to survivors like me .
Bloody hell, Adam has something there. Of course statistics are basically useless. They only show how many recorded abuse victims have become abusers themselves. As we know in blogworld, there is a huge number of abused who do not tell and cases and offenders never get recorded.
So maybe the picture that men reoffend is simplistic. Still, it is a vile stigma for male abusers to carry and one that I don’t like at all.
As for abusers using the same excuse as a reason to repeat behaviour, well I agree it is not an excuse. In my case he definitely was abused, to what extent I was never told.