Happy New Year!
Here’s hoping that 2007 is a great year full of healing and health for all of us.
And thank you all for reading, and contributing to the survivor community on-line. 2006 was a great year, I look forward to more of the same in 2007!
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I’ve written before about how I believe that what we often see as victim-blaming is really people with a need to feel safe finding a reason why something bad happened to that person, and why it wouldn’t happen to us. Statements like “she shouldn’t have been drinking that much”, or “he shouldn’t have been hanging…
Ellie Williams Was News Because It’s Rare but that won’t Stop People From Using It to Dismiss Survivors
Ellie damaged the lives of people she falsely accused. She has also potentially damaged the lives of many more victims who will be silenced because of this.
Quick Thought #15 – Do what you can, it’s good for you.
I want to share some research with you from this article: Do good, feel good: Random acts of kindness improve wellbeing, physical health The report in the journal Psychological Bulletin reviews 201 independent studies on prosocial behavior and its affect on well-being. After examining data on over 198,000 participants, Hui’s study reveals there is a modest link…
Last Weekend, I Fed a Giant Anteater – The Benefits of Hobbies and Adventures
What I was, however, during this experience, was engrossed in interacting with the animal and learning about it from the keeper. I wasn’t thinking about work, politics, or anything else, just being in the moment with my mind fully engaged in that one thing.Â
That is what is missing for many of us, and it’s absolutely leading to burnout, stress, and mental health issues.Â
The importance of unlearning our childhood stories
I could not heal until I unlearned that my abuse was something I somehow caused. Unlearning that opened up the possibility of learning something different, namely, that I was abused because someone decided to abuse me. Did that happen overnight? Of course not! Unlearning is a process, and the more closely we identify with a belief, the more difficult it becomes to unlearn it. So many survivors learn at a very early age to keep secrets, that bad things will happen if they tell anyone.
People who’ve never had that belief drilled into their young minds wonder why victims wait decades to come forward and tell their stories. That’s why! That belief is hard to unlearn. Many of us grew up with silence being the thing that prevents the abuse from being worse. Why should we start discussing it? If you tried to tell someone as a child and got shut down, this only gets worse.Â
