This was just a part of an email someone sent me the other day, and I wanted to share it with you.
I also want to say that your wife Angela must be an amazing woman.
You speak of her often, and the love you have for her shines through your words. You know how when you read written words, you actually hear yourself saying them silently. I was to a point where I came to your wife’s name…. Angela, and to myself I said ‘Angel’. Then I corrected myself, and read Angela….. and just then, I thought…… to Mike, she is
It made me happy to see that without having to get too sappy in my writing someone can see how much my wife means to me. I’ve never been a big proponent of having the right wife, husband, boyfriend, etc. be an important part of healing yourself as a survivor, because I did a lot of healing before she came along, and I believe each of us has the ability to do that work in ourselves. I don’t need Angela to be healthy.
On the other hand, it is important to have people in your life who you respect, and who inspire you to improve yourself. My wife does that in a couple of different ways. One, I adore her and aspire to be the husband she deserves to have. I can’t do that without constantly striving to improve myself. Secondly, she inspires me in her day to day life. When I watch the way she makes friends easily, interacts comfortably with people, is hospitable towards them, and generally attracts people to herself though her generosity and thoughtfulness I realize that I want to be more like that. I learn how to be a kinder, more thoughtful and better friend by watching my wife every day.
So, while I may not have needed my wife to be there supporting me to learn how to heal, it sure helps to have people in your live who do support you, inspire you, and who teach you through their examples how to improve yourself every day.
I hope, in 2008, you can find your own forms of inspiration, no matter where they come from!