We Still Have to Talk about Why Sexual Assault Victims, Including Kids, Don’t Come Forward

We Still Have to Talk about Why Sexual Assault Victims, Including Kids, Don’t Come Forward

Never mind the fact that they might have tried to tell someone and got shut down.

Never mind the fact that they might have told someone who didn’t believe them

Never mind the fact that telling someone is going to create a massive conflict within their own family.

Never mind the fact that it’s extremely unlikely that any sort of conviction will occur if they tell the police.

Never mind the fact that they will now, and maybe forever, be seen as damaged goods by a large segment of society.

Never mind that no matter how heinous the crime, they’ll have to answer question after question about what they did to provoke it.

The Importance of Just Listening
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The Importance of Just Listening

The people who helped me, and continue to help me, are the ones who will ask me questions and then just listen. They want to hear my story, even though they can’t fix it. They know that they can help by just giving me a space to tell my story, without worrying about the need to fight off their attempts at fixing something that may or may not be relevant at all to my situation. (i.e. I’m glad your cousin felt better after a walk in the forest, but that’s not what is happening here!) 

So please, just listen. Make the space around you, even if it’s virtual, a safe space for your friends and loved ones to tell their stories. Find small ways to help, if you can, but also know that by just listening, just sitting with our stories, you are already helping so much.

Quick Thought #16 – Good For Mark Cuban and Delonte West, but it Shouldn’t Be Like This

Quick Thought #16 – Good For Mark Cuban and Delonte West, but it Shouldn’t Be Like This

The story of Dallas Mavericks owner Mark Cuban finding former player Delonte West, and picking him up at a gas station in order to arrange for him to go to rehab, is a great story. I have nothing but respect for Cuban for going out of this way to help a former player, and I…

Talking About World Suicide Prevention Day
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Talking About World Suicide Prevention Day

In between work conference calls today, I had the opportunity to spend my lunch hour talking to Tiffany Werhner and the Moments of Clarity audience about being a survivor and the importance of World Suicide Prevention Day. I enjoyed having the opportunity to talk a bit about some of the really important issues, especially the…

Repeating the Same Mistakes in a Broken Mental Healthcare System

Repeating the Same Mistakes in a Broken Mental Healthcare System

Once upon a time, there were mental health asylums across the US. But, they weren’t great, and some of them were even mistreating patients. So, we closed them. The thought was that community-based services would be better, and now that we were closing the asylums, surely the resources necessary to pay for and staff these…

SafeTALK Training

SafeTALK Training

This past weekend, I attended a SafeTALK workshop put together by the local chapter of the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention. The half-day workshop is designed to help train folks to be more suicide aware, and to be “helpers” for those in need. The idea behind TALK is: Tell Ask Listen Keep safe. Obviously, if…