As pointed out later in the article below, the second-highest rate of suicide belongs to elderly white men. We have created a stereotype of the “grumpy old man” in our society. We’ve even made movies out of it. But don’t let that fool you, that grumpiness or the other moods we assume are just part of getting older, might not be that at all.
When you grow up constantly on the lookout for the “next” danger that was coming your way, or constantly worried about your own safety as a result of other people’s moods and actions, that doesn’t just stop when you become an adult. And, when you cannot turn it off, that can easily roll right into an anxiety issue.
And, I can also tell you firsthand that even when you do the therapy and some of the other suggestions from the article below, it can come back during especially stressful times.
Like now.
So, if this describes you, you’re not alone.
I recently had a conversation with someone dealing with anxiety and trying to learn more about it. She desperately needs to know that what she’s experiencing is something that many other people are going through and have gone through. So, I’ve told her about my anxiety. I’ve told her about the times my brain just won’t turn off, and my heart beats faster for no apparent reason at all. I’ve told her about the days when I struggle to remember things because my mind is racing so fast it doesn’t process things I just heard.
My wife has been there for those conversations. She’s heard me talk about things I’ve not really told her because I don’t want her to worry. Does she worry now? Maybe. Does it really matter to me?
Yes, it does. I don’t want her to worry, but I’ll trade that for letting someone we both care about know that they are not alone. This is why we need to talk about it. No one should feel alone and ashamed about any mental health issues they may be having. There are just too many others having the same ones for there to be room for judgment instead of support.
So, maybe Steven’s suggestion to start with a shower meditation might work for some of you who struggle like me. I’m going to try it, assuming I remember to actually do it instead of rushing to get finished and on to the next thing!
How do you incorporate mindfulness or meditation into your daily activities? Does it help you?
There is some good advice in the article about how to create, and maintain, healthy boundaries with a variety of toxic parent “types”, but I will always fall back on one fact of life as a survivor of childhood abuse, we came out of childhood with no idea of what a boundary is, let alone why we would create one. We were never given the opportunity to learn or practice this skill.
It’s OK if it takes us a minute to figure it out before we get it right.
I know this is a struggle for me. I notice every mistake I make. I dwell on them much longer than is healthy. When I do something well, even to the point of getting complimented? I forget it relatively quickly.
That’s not a good balance. I know I’m not alone in that. So what do I do?
