Sharing – You Don’t Need a Reason
Joy is in short supply these days, and if there is an activity that creates it for you, that is the best self-care you can practice.
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Sharing – Healed is a Myth and Marketing Tool
So many survivors want the answer to that first question. They want to know when this will be over and done with, but that’s not realistic. It would be like me asking when will I be “healed” from diabetes. I won’t be. My disease is something that is part of me that I have to manage. I take medicine, I watch what I eat, I don’t drink, etc. That’s not going to end. I fully understand that there is no future version of me where I don’t have to do any of those things.
Similarly, there is no future version of me that isn’t a survivor of child abuse. It happened. There is no cure I can buy that will create a version of me where I didn’t have that experience and be shaped by it. That’s not to say that I cannot have a great life, but I will always have a life impacted by those events.
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Sharing – Little Boys are Sexually Abused as much as Little Girls
I, for one, was sexually abused by an older boy. Not a stranger. Someone in my family. Many other men I know were abused by a family member, a member of the clergy, a coach, or some other trusted person known to their parents. I also went into my 20s planning to never tell anyone. I know many men go through most of their lives never planning to tell anyone. I was lucky to find other men who did talk about it, and helped me realize first that what happened to me was abuse and that someone would believe me if I spoke up.
I would argue that most men have never had that. Thus, they don’t show up in any statistics about sexual abuse. The sexual abuse of minors is chronically underreported and is likely to get worse as society continues to push victims to “move on” instead of speaking out. We need more spaces to discuss CSA, not fewer.
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Shared Links (weekly) Sept. 7, 2025
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Shared Links (weekly) August 31, 2025
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Sharing – Opinion: Mental health support saved my life. But what if I’d had to wait?
At any point in that journey, through all the ups and downs, not having support and access to a resource may have meant the difference between my healing and my not being here to type these words.
I think about that a lot, too. I think about how many unknown people have been lost who didn’t have that one connection or access to that one resource that could have helped them keep going. It’s a haunting thought. It’s a thought that motivates me to keep speaking and expect better from our society.
