Shared Links (weekly) June 8. 2025
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It was worth it, though. Stephanie is correct; if you don’t define yourself, other people will. It happened as a child to many of us when an abuser defined us as someone whom they could abuse; we took that lesson to heart and allowed others to keep defining us repeatedly. Some of those people may have wanted to help, some likely didn’t. It doesn’t matter. The only person who has the right to define you is you.
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Like her, I am all for doing what you need to for self-care, whatever that looks like for you. But we cannot simply prescribe better self-care practices to people who need our society to stop harming them.
Until we recognize that and fight for those changes, we are falling short in advocating for better mental health for everyone.
You don’t need to do anything to deserve getting help. You don’t need anyone else to permit you to act in ways that benefit your mental health. You not only deserve it, you need it. No one can take that away, including your past traumas
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