Survivors

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Sharing – ‘Blood Is Thicker Than Water’ Disrupting Your Peace?
ByMikeM August 10, 2020December 20, 2020 Reading Time: 2 minutes

One of the lessons that should be required learning for many of us, is that even with family, we get to set boundaries. We get to decide how much, or how little, we interact with other human beings. Also, what I decide is the way I want to set my boundaries, doesn’t mean yours need to be the same. As Carly lays out in the article below, there are quite a few things to consider, but it is your decision, and you should always put your own mental health first.

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Sharing – Abuse or neglect in childhood is linked to fear of self-compassion in young adulthood, study finds
ByMikeM August 3, 2020August 5, 2020 Reading Time: 2 minutes

This study is a little limited, in that they only surveyed women, and admit that it is a correlation study, meaning they didn’t attempt to determine if this was a cause and effect relationship, but I have talked to enough survivors of abuse to feel like this is pretty common. “In other words, participants who…

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Sharing – Child sex abuse survivors are five times more likely to be the victims of sexual assault later in life
ByMikeM July 24, 2020July 23, 2020 Reading Time: 2 minutes

The results of this study were pretty bleak, but they’re also complicated. “Unfortunately, though, child sexual abuse survivors were much more likely than those in the control group to be re-victimised in what are considered medium and high harm personal injury crimes. For instance, they were five times more likely to have been victims of…

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Sharing – Abuse Survivors and Our Bodies: Mistaking Correlation with Causation
ByMikeM July 22, 2020July 21, 2020 Reading Time: 1 minute

The article below is an important one. Sexual abuse survivors for sure, and survivors of other types of abuse as well, mistakenly assume that there is something about us, and about our bodies, that led to the abuse. It’s not true.

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Sharing – Pandemic Leaves Some Struggling with Survivor Guilt at Work
ByMikeM July 15, 2020July 15, 2020 Reading Time: 2 minutes

Yet, despite all the things I don’t have to deal with, I’m freaking exhausted. I’m constantly overwhelmed with trying to find ways I can help all of the people I know who are dealing with all of these things directly, and frustrated that I can’t really help in most cases.

And, let’s face it, the world is a mess right now. There is so much uncertainty about everything. Even if, like me, you’ve been lucky enough to continue working, and stay healthy, there’s no guarantee that won’t change tomorrow, or that someone close to you won’t get sick, or lose their job. In the midst of all that uncertainty, I think it;s OK to admit that I am both grateful for what I have and where I am, but still not OK.

I don’t think anyone right now, can be faulted for not being OK, so I also don’t think any of us should feel guilty about it either.

Raise your hand if you’re also dealing, but not really OK?

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Sharing – The Psycho-Physiology of Relationships: What You Don’t Know
ByMikeM July 14, 2020July 14, 2020 Reading Time: 1 minute

This is a powerful statement.

“Relationships are at the root of mental health in every way.”

For abuse survivors, we know this, even if we don’t always think about it. It’s the damage from abuse at the hands of another person that has such a huge impact on our mental health. It’s the reason when we talk about it occurring at the hands of a family member of loved one that other people struggle to believe us. That the relationship would be the source of abuse is unthinkable to people with good relationships.

But, we can also turn that statement on it’s head as well. It’s relationships that can undo that mental health damage that was done by abuse too.

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