What is it Like to Not Have Depression?


Last night, I came across an interesting article about depression, titled 50 Sufferers Describe Depression For People Who’ve Never Been Depressed

In response to sharing that article, on Twitter, Reine Jade had a wish that took the concept and turned it around.

An interesting idea to be sure. So, here’s your chance. If you have either never suffered from depression, or have come out of depression, what does that look like?

As for myself, the big difference that I see about when I had depression, and now that I really don’t, is balance. When I was depressed, I was really unable to feel happiness or joy about anything. It was all about what was wrong, and how everything that was wrong was specifically targeted at me. (Depression is actually a very narcissistic disease, everything negative effects you, directly, even when it has nothing to do with you.)

Not being depressed means having things that I enjoy, and the freedom to enjoy them. That doesn’t mean that I don’t have times of feeling sad, lonely, or stressed. Life is full of those emotions, but it is also full of joy, excitement, happiness, love and contentment. It’s when I can experience both positive and negative emotions without fear of being overrun by negativity that I know I am living a healthy emotional life, not suffering from depression.

In other words, when I get a good evaluation at work, I’m happy, and when I get a flat tire while driving, I can deal with it and take care of the situation in some way, I’m balanced emotionally. When my tire goes flat and I sit in the car and cry, unable to do anything about it, not so much.

Now it’s your turn? What does a life free of depression look like?

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  1. I doubt there was ever a day that went by after the abuse started that I wasn’t depressed. As a victim of abuse, it didn’t take the kids at school long to recognize my vulnerability and begin the bullying. The only delight I found in life was in those precious moments with my children when I could laugh and play and be the child I never was. I swore that no one would ever hurt them and I was totally devoted to their care. When they were 5 and 7 I was in a horrible car accident, I suffered a traumatic brain injury which left me unable to work or even function. I was told that I would be sent to Sister Kinney Institute in Minneapolis to learn how to live like that. I had seen dozens of specialists and they all agreed. I cried all the way home. I couldn’t understand why my entire life had been so controlled by the abuse and when I finally had a chance to be happy, my life had once again been taken away. I wanted to die. At that moment, I believed my husband could easily find someone worthy and kind who could raise my children. I don’t know how to explain what happened next because the brain injury took away my ability to dream. But somehow, as I slept that night, things started to change. When I awoke the next morning I was angry. I was not willing to learn to live like that. I figured if they could teach me how to tolerate my injuries I could work really hard and learn to overcome them. I have never looked back. I am so much better than the person who hurt me. My children deserved a mother who could laugh and make life fun and productive. I changed, and so can you. Depression is the badge of the aggressor. It allows them to win and that is totally unacceptable. As children, I guarantee we did nothing to deserve what happened to us. In watching my own children grow into remarkable adults, I am convinced that giving into the depression allowed the abuse to silently continue year-after-year. That is not an acceptable destiny for any of us. We are strong and we are talented. Depression no longer has a place at the table.

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