Quick Thought #21 – Stark Differences in How I Talk To Myself

I haven’t done one of these quick thought posts in a while, but last night was a great example of how poorly I talk to myself compared to how I talk to others.

Last night, I ordered dinner for my wife and I with an app. It’s an app I’ve used many times, like many others.

I failed to notice that the restaurant only offered pickup until we sat around, wondering why I hadn’t received any notification that our food was on the way. It had been sitting there, getting cold, waiting for us to pick it up for at least 20-25 minutes. We quickly hopped in the car to get it; all the while, I apologized over and over to my wife, berated myself internally for not noticing and screwing up our dinner, etc.

When we got there, I ran inside only to discover that the restaurant had only one meal, not two. Part of the order had gotten cut off, and no one caught it until I got there and asked about the second meal. The manager made things right very quickly, apologizing repeatedly.

My response?

“No worries, it’s all good. We’ve got our food, and that’s all that matters.”

And then I got back in the car, telling myself that this whole mess could have been avoided if I had handled ordering correctly in the first place.

What is wrong with me?

This is life with anxiety. This is what it’s like to struggle with ever feeling like you’re enough. If you’ve done something similar, I see you.