How many decisions are based on overcoming shame that doesn’t belong to us, or how many opportunities are passed up because we feel inadequate? I know it took me years to understand that I could accomplish just about anything, and I’m still deathly afraid of failing, even though I have before and know it’s not the end of the world.
Our trauma taught us how to react during childhood in ways that are, in fact, not at all appropriate to the reality of adult life. Things that remind us of our abuse can set off a panic in us, causing us to do, and say, things that are not appropriate to the current situation, and people on the receiving end of that communication can have a difficult time understanding what has happened. Interactions between survivors can be rife with underlying messages and reactions that have nothing to do with the current situation because we are all bringing our own trauma into the conversation.
“Multiple stressors in the child’s family and community context, and social and cultural attitudes that shame and blame victims, can create environments in which disclosure is fraught with difficulty. The process of disclosure often involves behavioural and indirect cues, and accidental disclosures, as much or more often than a conscious decision to tell someone about…
So says a new study out of Ohio State, and I’d have to say I would agree. The results suggest that it isn’t helpful to tell people with symptoms of depression or anxiety to simply be more grateful for the good things they have, Cheavens said. “Based on our results, telling people who are feeling…
New research finds that family support matters, even for college kids. University of Michigan investigators discovered that when college students feel isolated and disconnected, support from family members can keep them from harming themselves during difficult times, “Parents can serve as a first-line of defense in efforts to prevent or reduce the risk of suicide…
Men’s Alternative Safe House forced to close due to lack of funding tags: CA Actress and porn star Traci Lords reveals she was raped in Steubenville Ohio where two high school boys are on trial tags: CA Helping your kids protect themselves from abuse – Marc Klaas tags: CA What to Expect in Your First…
No, it isn’t fair that we have to have books to teach children how to protect themselves, but it’s reality. I don’t want small children to have to learn about the possibility of being abused, but leaving them uneducated and more vulnerable is not an option.
Oh, the other thing I appreciate about this book? It is focused on the danger from people the child already knows. Our “stranger danger” approach to child abuse has been terribly lacking for decades. I’m glad to see someone taking that on.
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