“The problem with the “you were molested and that’s why you’re gay” line of thinking – besides that it isn’t true – is that it dismisses people and their experiences. It neatly wraps up a version of people, labels them, and puts them in a category. There they can be filed away and forgotten. Otherwise, we might need to spend more time with them to find out that their lives are nothing like we thought they were.”
I’ve been on the other side of this same coin before, as a male survivor of sexual abuse. People assume that I am gay when they interact with me online. The sad thing is, it’s not just religious people who do that, it’s also been gay men who see a male talking about sexual abuse and just assume that the author is gay as well.
It’s quite awkward to have to correct them, but the reason I don’t appreciate it is exactly what Tim says here. Don’t take one fact about my life and assume to know me. It’s rude.