So here I am, in my 40’s, trying to heal and put my life back together. The problem now is that I’m having a ton of emotional distress trying to process all of these factors: the abuse, the bullying, relationships, and my mother. At this point I’m just not doing a very good job of it, I fully admit it here and I’ve admitted as much to J and my trusted friend/colleague.
The progress I’ve made in those others areas seems to have stalled out and been put on the back burner. That is unbelievably frustrating since I know I have a long way to go in all of those areas to feel more healed and comfortable with where I am now and where the blame should go for those events. Yes, I still blame myself at times, but I’m getting better at not doing that.
As I read Matt’s post, I started thinking about workplace productivity. Yes, you read that right. That’s because one of the things you’ll learn very quickly is that multitasking is probably a myth. No one actually multitasks. They just bounce from one task to the next, and then back to the previous one.
Healing isn’t any different. If there’s an issue taking precedence in healing right now, other issues will, by necessity, take a back seat.
And that’s ok. As long as one area is seeing healing, you’re on the right path. It’s not a race, it’s a process, and processes are ok so long as they are continuing to get to the end result.