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Sharing – How Safety and Success Intertwine in Childhood
Asking someone to help you, to put them out in any way, is not only bothersome, but it can often lead to violence. The eggshells Kara describes in the article are a visceral memory for me. I also vividly recall all the opportunities I didn’t take advantage of growing up, because they might have required me to ask for help from a parent.
Book Review of Sorts – Quit: The Power of Knowing When to Walk Away
For many survivors, their definition of healed automatically becomes a goal that can never be reached. We should quit trying to “be the person I was before the abuse” because it’s impossible. By setting that as our pass/fail goal, we sentence ourselves to a lifetime of falling short, instead of a lifetime of celebrating the gap between where we started and where we are today. We also never find a better goal that is more realistic.
Please, take a good look at how you are defining healed. More importantly, don’t lose sight of the amount of healing and growth that you’ve already done. Be proud of it. This is your life, it’s not a pass/fail exam. It’s so much bigger than that.
Link – What You Can Do To Help Male Survivors of Sexual Abuse
First off, I totally agree with the other points in the article about shame, and how it’s that emotion that gets in the way for all sexual abuse survivors, but in some very specific ways for male survivors. Secondly, I love this, while also acknowledging that this is maybe one of the hardest things to…
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