Sharing – When a Sibling Causes Harm

In the post below, Rachel has it exactly right. We don’t talk nearly enough about sibling abuse.

We have to recognize not only that sibling abuse is abuse in the same way abuse by an adult is but that it also brings some unique complications. Rachel’s description of the impacts might sound familiar to all abuse survivors, but it’s the family dynamics that are different.

I should know. I have navigated those dynamics most of my life. It’s not easy. I was an adult before my parents found out about the abuse, and it wasn’t easy knowing that my parents had a relationship with my abuser, but how could I expect them not to have one with their child? At least we were all adults, and I could easily avoid contact.

I remember the conversation I had with my mother at the time. I had to define the boundaries. For me, they were simple. I wouldn’t ask her never to talk to my sibling so long as she understood that I didn’t want to hear about him or be expected to attend the same family events.

Unfortunately, when my parents passed away, funerals became something else to navigate. That also becomes complicated.

I do not know how difficult it would have been had they known when we were both under 18. How do you navigate that as a family?

That’s why we need to talk about it. Keeping that kind of abuse hidden makes it more difficult for families to figure out the best way to navigate an abusive situation between siblings, and I know there are many survivors out there who have struggled with exactly this situation.

https://cptsdfoundation.org/2024/11/13/when-a-sibling-causes-harm/