boundaries

  • Sharing – 11 Factors That Increase the Risk of Child Sexual Abuse

    ByMikeM Reading Time: 2 minutes

    For example, if we know that kids who don’t understand boundaries, are lonely, live in stressful family situations, and do not have open communication with other people in their lives, are more likely to be sexually abused, what does that mean when a teen comes out and is not accepted by their family? Or when a blended family becomes dysfunctional, or a kid with disabilities is not taught boundaries but kept hidden away from others?

    You have kids who are lonely, who don’t feel safe and loved, who don’t understand boundaries, etc.

    If a kid who’s lonely and lacking in self esteem is at risk. And a kid who identifies as LGBTQ+ is at risk, can we stop for a minute and consider that it’s not being LGBTQ+ that is a risk factor, it’s how much more likely that kid is to be lonely and lacking in self-esteem?

    And thus, the cycle continues. When it shouldn’t. We know what it is about disabled kids, kids from blended families, or LGBTQ+ kids that make them more prone to abuse, mental health issues, and suicide. It’s not their reality, it’s the responses to their reality that create the risk factors. The things that make them more likely to be loners, disconnected from family support, lacking safe adults to communicate with, etc.

    So maybe we should focus on being more supportive of all kids?

    And, since we’re on the topic and it is June. Happy Pride!

  • Practice Setting Boundaries

    ByMikeM Reading Time: 1 minute

    I like the fact that they not only offer concrete things to say but also some background on how to define your own boundaries and what that means. I know for may survivors, we have to first address the core issue, the elephant in the room, before we can start the practice, so let me just go ahead and say that:

    You deserve to set your own boundaries.

    Full stop. Let that sink in, let it rattle around in your brain, keep reading it until you believe that about yourself.

    Then, go take a look at the practical examples of doing that.

    What boundaries do you struggle with? What has helped you do better at maintaining them?

  • Sharing – Setting Boundaries Emerging from Pandemic Isolation

    ByMikeM Reading Time: 1 minute

    I have to admit, that even in a situation where I feel like I’m not in much danger of COVID-19 any longer, I’m also still feeling a ton of social anxiety. I have to decide what level of comfort I have with people, and how to communicate that to other people. I thought the tips offered in the article below make a lot of sense.