For many survivors, their definition of healed automatically becomes a goal that cannot ever be reached. We should quit trying to “be the person I was before the abuse” because it’s impossible. By setting that as our pass/fail goal we sentence ourselves to a lifetime of falling short, instead of a lifetime of celebrating the gap between where were started and where we are today. We also never find a better goal that is more realistic.
Please, take a good look at how you are defining healed. More importantly, don’t lose sight of the amount of healing and growth that you’ve already done. Be proud of it. This is your life, it’s not a pass/fail exam. It’s so much bigger than that.
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