Feb 09 Edition of the Carnival Against Child Abuse
Nancy Richards in hosting this month’s edition and has it posted over on her Heal and Forgive blog.
As always, there’s a lot of good stuff in there, I look forward to reading more!
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Sharing – You Don’t Need a Reason
Joy is in short supply these days, and if there is an activity that creates it for you, that is the best self-care you can practice.
Sharing – Queer survivors of sexual abuse are frequently blamed for their own victimization
I’ve talked about this before. As a male survivor, I have spent years on this site dealing with people that simply assumed I was gay, for no other reason than the fact that I was abused by a male perpetrator. I’ve known plenty of other men who’ve been shunned because of a similar assumption, or the much worse assumption that survivors, especially male survivors or gay men, are likely to turn around and also sexually abuse others.
None of this is accurate. Yes, the abuse can leave you feeling unsafe and uncomfortable in your own body and with your own sexuality. That is a side effect of being raped sometimes. That is not something anyone should be ashamed to talk about and no matter where they land on the spectrum of gender and sexual preference they deserve the respect and privacy to figure that out themselves. None of us asked your opinion, and none of us want to hear about your own illusions of how sexuality works after being sexually abused at a young age.
The more mature attitude is to recognize that healing from sexual abuse is a process that looks different for everyone, whether they are gay, straight, bisexual, non-binary and any other thing you want to consider. We all deserve a better response than to be accused of bringing it upon ourselves.
Sharing – What happens after you tell your story? That’s a story in itself
And if you feel strongly that you want to write a book, start a site like this, and hit social media and tell the world, make sure you are prepared for all of it. Once it’s out, you no longer control it.
Once you’re sure, though, tell your story for all the people who aren’t ready yet.
November 18 – International Survivors of Suicide Loss Day
It’s a day where people who’ve suffered loss due to suicide can get together, organized by the AFSP. From their website: Survivor Day is the one day a year when people affected by suicide loss gather around the world at events in their local communities to find comfort and gain understanding as they share stories of…
Reviews Elsewhere – The Gap and the Gain by Dr. Benjamin Hardy
If this gap feeling describes where you are in your healing, turn your gaze around from looking at the goal and how far it may be to how much further along you are on that path than you were 1, 3, or 5 years ago.
You might be surprised by how far you’ve come in that time. You might even take a moment to feel proud of yourself.
