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Link – Growing Up With an Abusive Parent: Borderline Personality Disorder
This is so very true, and such a struggle for those of us who grew up constantly being criticized, belittled, and abused. “In this case, the words that hurt, the words of abuse, are constant reminders of what others thought of us. Absent of any positive reinforcement, these words may have become hardwired within us….
Sharing – The Benefits of Having Positive Social Interactions
I can’t remember the last time I had many of those little incidental interactions. Once upon a time they were frequent, multiple times a day. Now?
Yeah, not as much. which is why we need to try and create some of these interactions, even if they can’t always be in person. A few texts back and forth, a quick call, a chat with coworkers on our messaging platform, laughter with the people you do see, etc.
I miss the interactions I used to have, there’s no doubt about that, but I am trying, not always successfully, to make sure I still manage to create some. I know how vital that connectedness is for my own mental health.
I also know I’m not alone in that.
Link – Abuse-Proofing Your Children: Adult Predators
The term “abuse-proofing” gives me pause, because I don’t think you can ever guarantee that something you do will absolutely protect them, but there are some good tips and thoughts in this article, like this: Early in my graduate training, I stumbled over some great information and advice in my studies on all aspects of…
Sharing – Writing can improve mental health – here’s how
I would imagine that part of the reason that no one agrees on the why and how has a lot to do with the fact that it might actually be different for different types of people.
For example, I know some folks who benefit from writing out their emotions, as the article talks about. But there are also those of us who benefit not necessarily from directly writing our emotions to release them, but gain self-awareness through focusing our thoughts to communicate them in written form.
Maybe, there are just a lot of ways writing is good for you, mentally?
Sharing – Acknowledging Limits – Helping Others
One of the things I immediately recommend to anyone asking about starting a blog like mine is to set your boundaries. If you don’t, you’ll burn out and be gone within 6 months. Decide what you will say, what you won’t, and how much time you’ll dedicate to writing for the blog and interacting with people online. Because if you don’t you’ll find yourself unable to cope and you’ll bail on it.
I’d say the same thing about anything. Yes, be with someone who needs support, but set your boundaries around it, and make sure you are still taking care of your own life. Because the only thing worse than someone not sitting and listening to a friend or loved one when they are struggling, is having some do it for a while, and then disappear. That doesn’t do anyone any good. We all need you to be well just as much as we need you to stick with relationships when someone is dealing with healing, or mental health issues.
Set your boundaries, and be willing to stick to them, lovingly. As Liz says in her piece, it’s not about you doing everything, it’s about you pointing them to a whole host of options for support. That is what being a good support system is all about.
@SurvivorNetwork Read Ian Pace blog on truth of Fridays meeting and Woolf resignation
RT @SurvivorNetwork: This Week’s Links (weekly): To The Secondhanders: Those Who Love People Who’ve Survived Abuse tags: CA ChildAbuse… …
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