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Responses to Elmo Show How Traumatized Many of Us Are, And How Few People We Can Talk To About It
What I find interesting about this, beyond the obvious take that many people out there are not doing well, is that if you asked this same question to many of your friends, coworkers, and acquaintances, you probably wouldn’t see the same thing. There’s something about trauma-dumping to a fictional character that allows us to be honest without fear that we are too much for people to deal with. I worry about it all the time. If you asked me how I am on any given day, 99% of the time, I’d say something like “Not bad.” I might admit to struggling the other one percent of the time, but also probably downplay it.
Let me tell you a secret. I struggle much more than one percent of the time. I also don’t want people to worry about me, and I don’t want my struggles to be too much for the people in my life. I make my emotions small to protect other people. I know I’m not the only one.
Shared Links (weekly) Mar. 16, 2025
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Link – Lakeland good Samaritan: ‘My life is tarnished’ after social media shaming
Hey remember how we were all supposed to be ashamed of ourselves after that group in England ran an experiment to see who would stop to help a lost child at a rail station? Maybe this is why so few people stopped. This is the society we have become, where a man tries to help…
Sharing – The impact of non-recent child sexual abuse on the wider family
As I’ve mentioned before, I didn’t wait until my 40s or 50s to tell someone about my abuse, and my family found out about it in my 20s, primarily due to my roommate having to answer their questions about my mental health breakdown. I didn’t get to choose whether my parents found out, but I’m also thankful that he went ahead and had that difficult conversation with them. I needed them to know what happened so that they could be part of my life while I tried to heal my mental health.Â
On the other hand, I would be lying if I said everything in the family was great after that. It’s complicated and occasionally messy.
Sharing – How to Respond When Mental Health Advice Feels Like Judgment
Look, I get it, you tried something and it helped you, or you’ve seen it help someone else. Clearly, you are excited about the possibility of helping others, but you’re forgetting something. You’re forgetting that the person you are sharing this advice with, isn’t you.
When you come walking into a conversation with friends, or especially into online communities with statements like the ones above, the message you are actually sending is “Gee, fixing this is easy, you’re just doing it wrong”.
Imagine using those actual words towards someone you barely know. You wouldn’t, would you? At least if you’re a decent human being, you wouldn’t. But you are totally willing to take your beliefs, your own experience, and completely railroad another person’s current reality with it, you are doing something awfully similar. In a moment of emotional vulnerability, you have come in, guns blazing, with the suggestion that all of this pain they are in, and all of this struggling they are going through, should have been easy to avoid.
Sharing – How giving to others can boost mental and physical health
Obviously, today, you’ll hear a lot about fundraising efforts, and that’s fine. However, that’s only one way to give of yourself. Even small acts of kindness can positively affect our mental health and boost our outlooks. So, if you’re struggling right now, feeling out of sorts with the world, etc., do something nice. Volunteer your time, give money, or notice someone who could use a small act of kindness and provide it.Â
