I know that I’ve talked before about survivors not coming forward for years, and how this is especially true for men, who typically don’t disclose to anyone until their 50s. In a recent interview with People, John Stamos briefly talks about his own experience with child abuse, and I want you to pay close attention to the reasons he didn’t tell anyone until now:
Over the weekend I listened to this episode of the Happiness Lab podcast and I wanted to share it because I think Dr. Santos and her guests hit on some pretty interesting topics. Specifically, I felt like this was some more scientific evidence for how small actions, like compliments, can create a connection between people and make both the giver and the receiver, happier.
So, dear readers. rather than assuming mental health apps don’t work because I haven’t done a good job of using them and letting them help me, let’s have a conversation about what mental health apps have, or haven’t, worked for you, and why. I’m curious to know what the crowd has to say, and what advice you would give others.
We’ve talked a lot about the importance of connection when it comes to mental health. Being connected to others is a great tool in suicide prevention, and we see study after study reporting on the negative effects of loneliness. One great way to create a connection among your friends is to ask for help when you need it. People, generally, like to help. The little bit of vulnerability it takes to ask for help can create a huge improvement in the connection between two people.
Unless, of course, you don’t bother to acknowledge the help with a thank you.
There are more details to describe what some men meant by no one, but no one was a very popular response. I’m not surprised by that. I think most men don’t open up 100% to anyone. Part of it is not having that kind of relationship with anyone, part of it is society’s expectations of men to be strong and stoic, part of it is women’s expectations that the men in their lives remain strong and stoic, and part of it is just our unwillingness to have uncomfortable conversations.
We all have the ability to create these moments of connection. Unfortunately, too many of us choose not to. That is to our own detriment as well as the other people we could impact.
